Episode 47: First Step To Your Morning!

 

Getting out of bed healthy and alive is already a huge bonus. That is why you should not take your mornings for granted and establish a positive reaction and routine the moment you open your eyes. How you start your mornings dictate how you function the rest of the day. In this episode, Brendan Meyers shares how he goes about his day, starting with his morning routine, highlighting how discipline is the core to attaining a better day and overall better life.

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First Step To Your Morning!

Making Discipline A Habit

If you haven’t followed me on Instagram, go ahead and do that. I’ve been updating everyone for my contest prep on October 5th. It’s going down in Denver, Colorado. I’m @TheBMeyers, you can look me up on Instagram. I always respond to your messages and questions. There is something that came up for me from Instagram for this QuickTime Friday which is, “What’s my morning routine?” and I want to build off of that, “What should you be doing with your first step out of bed?” Those moments in the morning that we take for granted. The gratitude, the appreciation, to focus the hard work, the dedication, the consistency of getting out of bed at that same time every single morning. It’s a win. When you get out of your bed, it is a win. There was a point in time in my life where I couldn’t even get out of bed. I was hurt. I was sick. I couldn’t get out of bed. I found a lot of gratitude now and appreciation for life because I couldn’t get out of bed a long time ago.

What is your first reaction when you wake up? When you open up those eyes from a deep sleep? Maybe you haven’t been sleeping well all night. What is your first reaction? “Phone, coffee, I need to brush my teeth. I need to take a dump.” In all seriousness, that first step out of bed, what do you do? I take that sigh. I take that first step out of bed and make my bed. Why do I do it? I’m preparing for the day. I’m preparing for my life. If I can’t do something that is a discipline for me the first thing that I get out of my bed, how am I showing up in the rest of my life? Is it going to be different? Is it going to be the same? I don’t know. I feel as though when you first take that step out of bed, you’ve got to do something that requires discipline. If you make it a way of life. It’s a consistent thing. It’s a discipline.

Discipline is part of consistency. Click To Tweet

Discipline is a part of consistency. It’s a play on words. When you take out that first step from your bed, you’re setting up your disciplines for the day, all of them. Imagine if you don’t go to your phone, maybe you step out of bed. You make your bed. You make sure your room is clean. You go into the restroom and then you do your business. You handle your business. Maybe your journal. Maybe you take a full glass of CreateU Greens with coconut water. Right after that, you go for a 5,000-step walk. That will take about an hour or so. That’s something that will help you win the day because you’re preparing your mind. You’re preparing everything in your body. You’re waking up your body with incredibleness. You’re waking up to be incredible. Have you ever heard of The Incredibles? That’s my shit. That would be running around, saving the world, The Incredibles. You’ve got to be one of those fake people. You’ve got to set yourself up to win.

CUE 47 | Morning RoutineLet me go through my morning routine. I step out of bed and I make my bed. I look at the board to see how many days I have left for a specific goal. My goal now is to step on stage, October 5th, 2019 in Denver, Colorado for muscle contest. I see how many days are left. I erase the day prior. I’m feeling good. I usually grab my phone, I put it into my bathroom. I play some music or I listen to ESPN, something that is very relaxing for me and I poop. I go and I use the restroom. After I use the restroom, I brush my teeth. I use this charcoal mouthwash. I come out of my bedroom knowing that I’m feeling freshened up. I get dressed. I always have my shoes on whenever I leave my bedroom. I go have a full glass of my CreateU Greens, my Creatine HCL and then I will take my vitamin C and my vitamin B12. I have everything that I need.

 

CUE 47 | Morning Routine

 

I’m still listening to ESPN YouTube. I love sports. It’s very relaxed for me. You’ve got to set yourself up to win in these ways. I make some food then I’m out the door to go to the gym. The first thing that I do in my day is always going to the gym or train. It’s important to me. It sets me up to win. It prepares everything for that day. If I don’t make my bed, I feel like shit, to be honest. If I don’t use the restroom, I feel like shit. If I don’t use the mouthwash, I feel like shit. If I don’t use the restroom, I feel like shit. If I don’t use mouthwash, I fill like shit. If I don’t eat enough, I feel like shit. If I don’t have my greens juice, I have that feeling of, “I missed something. I don’t know what it is but I miss something.” It’s all about consistency. Discipline is doing this every single day so that I’m prepared for the entire day and for what’s to come.

CUE 47 | Morning Routine

 

After the gym, I sit in my car or go for a walk. Through this I Journal on my phone, I’m developing, creating and writing down a book called 30 Days and Counting: Road to the Stage. That will be released eventually. It’s my preparation for competing and launching a business, CreateU Nutrition, signing athletes and being a part of many different businesses and ventures. I want to show what it takes to everyone and what goes through my mind during this whole process. After that, I go home and I eat, then I start my day. I’m generally ready to go at 9:30 AM to 10:00 AM for the entire day. I work from 10:00 AM until 4:00 PM and generally from 4:00 PM on, I allow myself to relax. I go for walks. I hang out with someone. I go for a hike. I drive out into the mountains in Denver. If I have a lot of work to do, I just work. I work until 6:00 to 10:00, whatever the case may be, then I go back to sleep around 9:30 or 10:00.

CUE 47 | Morning Routine

 

It starts my day. My first step out of my bed is gratitude to thank you so much, Lord. Thank you for everything you’ve provided me, the opportunities. Thank you, Brendan, for showing up yesterday. I always reminisce through the journaling about how did my workout go. What are the accomplishments that I did? Generally, in my workouts, I make some incredible PRs every single time. I talk about PRs in different ways, Personal Records. It could be even how I feel after I warmed up. It’s the first time ever in the first couple of years that I don’t have back pain. Maybe when I’m on my stair stepper and I’m doing my cardio 25 minutes as hard as I can go, I get one calorie further than I did. Maybe I didn’t burn as many calories, but the first half of the stair stepper was the fastest I’ve ever gone. I look at all these wins and it becomes a discipline in my life that I’m just a winner. That’s all I do is I win. There’s no question.

When you're willing to create yourself with that first step and prepare yourself for the rest of your day, life will become a lot easier. Click To Tweet

That first step out of bed has taught me something than just a step out of bed. It’s taught me way more than that. It’s taught me that anything is possible. It’s taught me that I am one in a trillion. It’s taught me that I am everything that I’ve ever wanted to be and more. It taught me everything. When you’re willing to create yourself with that first step and prepare yourself for the rest of your day, life will become a lot easier. I hope this motivated you. I pray that you took something from this. Maybe it ignited something for your breakthrough. Maybe your vision is going to come to life now. That’s my goal. That’s the CreateU goal. Create you. Create you whether it’s Friday, it can be Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. It doesn’t matter if you’re on iTunes or Spotify. We’re on all audio platforms. It doesn’t matter if you’re in your car, on your way to work, or you’re at school. Everyone will listen. It doesn’t matter where you are in your life.

This is the opportunity for you to create yourself. Make it seem like you’re getting out of bed. It could be 4:00 PM that you’re reading this. Get out of the bed. Take that first step. Become disciplined. Create that consistency. Stay dedicated. Fill yourself with passion and go get what is yours and that’s your vision. I appreciate you. Thanks for tuning in for another episode of the show. Check out the CreateU Nutrition lines. We are officially launched. We have Greens juice. We have the Creatine HCL. We have probiotics. We’re developing a very innovative pre-workout, vegan protein and so much more. Peace.

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Episode 45: The Truth About Being A Mom with Brittany Lesser

 

Being a mom in this day and age means having to find that certain work-life balance. Someone who has that figured out is health and fitness YouTuber, Brittany Lesser. In this episode, Brittany shares her thoughts on various personal topics that give us a view of the life of a modern-day mom. She talks about the importance of showing up for the people you love, what makes marriage work, and health. Crediting her overall success to motherhood, Brittany also talks about being a single mother to her son, the realities of having a baby, and the struggles of being a mom that people don’t know about. Get a dose of inspiration from Brittany, especially if you are a mom or on the way to becoming one, on today’s show.

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The Truth About Being A Mom with Brittany Lesser

What Having A Baby Is Really Like

I’m joined by a good friend. Before I introduce her, I want first to remind you that not only are we here on all audio platforms, but we’re also on YouTube. If you want to check us out, we also have an experience. The experience was me and her training and working out. It was a brutal workout. We also do things like give back to the homeless and we also give strategies and structures so you can get to know the guest that is on the show.

Every Friday, we have something called the Quick Time Friday where I personally dive into topics and I discuss things that you might have never even thought. One of them was sex. Definitely check that out every Friday. When you review the podcast on iTunes, it’s very simple. You go into the description on YouTube, you click on the link, you put in your email info and you provide a review on iTunes. We send seven incredible gifts to you through a login portal and you get access to the CreateU Dashboard. It’s cool, you should check that out. Brittany Lesser, what’s up? Tell our audience who you are. You have a beautiful baby, Grayson. You’re very impactful on social media. You’re very charismatic. You share all of you. You don’t hide anything. You’re very transparent with people. You’re intentional. Who are you? Where does all this come from?

Years and years ago, I started a blog and that’s how I started on social media. Before I even had Instagram, I was writing a blog.

Do you still have the blog?

I switched blogs. It started off as a running blog.

Who runs? We’re bodybuilders. We walk here.

Now I don’t run, but I ran a half marathon and I was a long-distance runner when I first got into health and fitness. I started a blog and my blog was pretty popular, I’m not going to lie.

How popular? Was it very popular?

It was pretty good. I started out blogging and then I got onto Instagram and the whole nine yards. After I ran long distances, I saw bodybuilders like Jamie Eason and Amanda Latona and I was like, “I want to be them.” I switched over to bodybuilding and then that’s how I grew my following on social media.

Where did it come from, growing your social media?

It was mostly YouTube. I was sharing my first bikini prep. This was 2014. I guess people were fascinated in bikini prep during that time.

Are they still or not as much?

It’s died down a little bit because a lot of people compete in and they’re like, “This isn’t that healthy especially for women.” Now it’s transferred. People are still interested in it. In 2014, it was huge. I started blogging and my YouTube grew fast and my Instagram grew along with it too. My Instagram has been through different phases like fitness, modeling and then all these different things.

If you haven’t checked it out yet, we had an episode on Quick Time Friday and I had her on. We talked about how to get a hot girl. You grew your social media. Something very interesting you said is that people found out that bodybuilding wasn’t healthy for women.

That’s what most people talk about now. I feel like most of the influencers that were into bodybuilding, now most of them just do the self-love type like, “I’m healthier now that I’m eating food, like getting a period. For women, it’s so much harder.

Is it not healthy?

It can be but I know for me, my body’s very sensitive, so the second I start dieting, I lose my period. It’s not healthy. You get a period for a reason.

Is it birth control?

If you do have birth control, sometimes you don’t get your period and that’s normal.

Do you agree with birth control?

I’m on it. I have always hated it.

Why do you hate it?

It’s always made me feel terrible. It’s hormones pumping in your body. It’s not natural.

The industry is fucked in so many different areas. Nutrition in general, the grocery stores, you get medication and it’s birth control. You’re removing something that’s natural to your body. We’re trying to make all these configurations and manipulating this and manipulating that. The fact is that when we’re manipulating everything, how can biology keep up with the transformation and the evolution of humans? How can everything around us keep up with it?

Birth control is used for so many different reasons too. It can help different health issues.

You started growing and the influence kept on coming and coming. How many serious relationships have you been in?

I say technically two.

Who were they? Who was the first one?

This guy named Christian was my first love.

How old were you?

I was twenty. I was in college and then he was 22.

How long were you guys together?

CUE 45 | Being A Mom

 

Not long, it was definitely less than a year.

You then were with Matt.

Matt was my longest because we have a baby.

Let’s get into Grayson. If you don’t know, Brittany has a baby named Grayson. One thing that I see that’s so unique about Brittany and special about you is the way you show up for not only your son, but the way you show up for other people on social media. I want to talk about that and what that truly means to the future of not only your son, but to the future of yourself. Showing up in that way, where does that come from? Is your mom similar to being a mom and also showing up on social media with so much transparency and being yourself?

With the social media thing is I’ve always been extremely transparent. I’ve always shared a lot. Grayson has an Instagram and he had almost 10,000 followers and then I deleted them all and I made it private. Matt was like, “We could keep it.”

His Instagram, why did you take that down and remove that? You didn’t want anybody to be a part of the whole thing?

I have a lifestyle Instagram. I post them all the time on there, but I felt like I can keep that more personal for people that we know, friends and family. The honest truth is I saw a gossip page about me and it freaked me out. They started talking about Grayson. I was like, “I don’t want to subject him to this.” They were talking mean things about me and I never read those. I get it. They don’t even know me. They were saying mean things about me, about Matt and then about Grayson and I was like, “I don’t want to subject him to something that he can’t even control it.” He’s one and there are people gossiping about him on the internet. It felt weird to me that there are people that don’t know him talking about him. It’s different if Matt and I put ourselves out there. That’s our decision, but he’s one.

Matt is a good dad as well. That’s also important is showing up for your son. I respect you locking it down. You show up for them. Was your mom the same way with you, like charismatic and fun? Was it completely opposite?

Her and my dad divorced when I was pretty young, so she raised me. They separated when I was in third grade.

Was it rough for you though?

Absolutely, but she was an amazing mom. We had a lot of fun, but I did get grounded a lot. I apologize to my mom now, I’m like, “I was a bitch.”

If you’re a mother that’s reading this, be prepared.

It’s scary to have a girl. I want to have a girl, but I’m scared of it.

How many kids do you want?

I want three or four.

What is your thought on marriage? Marriage has changed now. What is marriage to you?

In my opinion, marriage is extremely important because that’s 100% commitment to your partner. I get you can be 100% committed, but why not? If you are 100% committed, what’s holding you back? When I say 100% commitment, I think that includes everything like respect, trust, loyalty, communication, effort, all of that. That’s 100% commitment. If you don’t have all of those things, then you’re not 100% committed to your partner. It’s like, “Why not?” Marriage is significant to me. I don’t think the timing of marriage is important because I had a baby out of wedlock.

What’s wedlock?

You have it outside of marriage.

It’s very important to you. Do you think that stems from your childhood of the divorce? In third grade you’re like, “I want that. I want it to work.”

The one promise I made to myself was I didn’t want to give my kids a broken home, but here I am a single mom. I don’t think the timing is important. If you want to have a baby first, that’s fine and then you want to get married, that’s fine. I was hoping for that next step. My parents were married too and they were married for many years. In third grade, they separated and then they got legally divorced when I was in fifth grade.

I thought they were just married for a few years.

They were married for a long time. I feel like they weren’t happy the whole time. They argued a lot and it wasn’t always a healthy marriage. I think it’s a commitment.

What is a commitment to you? What does that represent?

It’s everything. It’s effort. It’s trust. It’s loyalty. It’s honesty. It’s love.

How many people do you know honestly have all that with themselves? How many people do you know trust themselves, are loyal to themselves, work hard, are consistent with their own relationship, with everything in their own life, all this stuff?

It goes up and down all the time.

Do you know anyone that is as close to 100%?

I feel like I am to myself. I don’t always love myself.

I want to check into this because what you said is like, “Myself,” and I asked about other people around you. There are two things that come up for me and with society. Number one is communication between that. You have it with yourself, but what about the communication with someone else to get them to also see it within themselves and have that same thing or even to match that. The majority of people don’t have it within themselves. They don’t trust themselves. They don’t communicate with themselves.

Even grabbing a brownie when you said, “I’m not going to have a brownie,” and you do it anyway. That right there is a representation of distrust of yourself and also implementing your intentions. No one’s perfect, but when you look at it from the perspective like, “How is someone else going to get married to someone if they have so much work to do with themselves?” If someone doesn’t trust themselves, how can someone that’s not honest themselves go into a relationship, get married and know it’s going to work very well? What’s your perspective on that?

They’re probably not ready. I’m not saying that you have to be 100% trusting yourself and everything like that in order to get married. There’s also the thing like, “You can’t love anyone else before you love yourself.” Some people do love other people before they love themselves or alongside them.

The thing with marriage is that people don't realize that relationships take work. That's why people are so afraid of it. Click To Tweet

What you’re saying is they grow with somebody else?

Yeah. Some people like that can’t happen and I get it. There are certain circumstances where the person needs to be by themselves to grow. I feel like my first relationship, I didn’t love myself at all. We were also young. I don’t think it would have ever been a forever type thing.

Growing with someone else is always very important, but there are also all those other aspects of like, “Are you ready? Am I ready? Are other people ready around us?” How many people are truly able to love on that level? Marriage is the ultimate love. It’s not like, “I love you a little bit. I’m going to put this $5,000 ring on your finger and let’s giddy up into the sunset because in a couple of years, shit’s going to be rough. It’s going to be different.”

The thing with marriage though is that people don’t realize that relationships take work. That’s why people are so afraid of marriage. They think it’s supposed to be easy or you’re not always going to have the passion that you have in the very beginning of a relationship. People are like, “I don’t love you anymore,” type of thing. It’s like you probably do love them, but you’ve got to work for it. If you’re with someone for many years, that’s a long time.

My parents have been married for too many years. My experience is once people stop working towards it, the love dies on one side. It’s not about it dies on both sides. Generally, it’s just one side that dies. This is my thought is that I always feel like there’s one person that loves the other person more. That’s the thought that I have is that it might even be a little bit. I do believe in that. Once you stop working together on that growth, that one person slows down a little bit. It’s like someone that’s out of shape that’s going for a run. Once it gets to a certain point, they’re going to fall behind. How do we combat that? What’s your suggestion, especially in relationships because we talked about relationships a little bit about how to get a hot girl for a guy? What are your thoughts on combating that long-term with growth? Let’s talk about the relationship. Do you think it’s just date nights? Is it going to seminars together? Is it even going to counseling before you need anything? What are your thoughts on that?

It’s definitely setting time for each other to spend quality time because a lot of people would sit on the couch and don’t talk. The most important thing is never stopping learning about your partner. I’m not an expert, but some people will be like, “We’ve been together for many years. We know everything we know about each other,” but it’s like, “I feel like there’s so much.” As you are in a relationship and you grow together, you grow on your own and then you also go through different life experiences. You’re not the same person. I saw something on Instagram where the marriage you need at 25 is a different marriage than you need at 45 and a different marriage than you get at 65. The goal is to have those different marriages with the same person. I thought that was cool. It’s different. You’re not the same person.

I like that. It’s like my relationship with water. My relationship with water is different at 25 than it is at 35 or 40, but it’s still the same water. It’s evolved. I’m not 45, I’m pretty close.

You didn’t tell me about your age.

What’s your thought about that? I don’t tell anybody my age.

I don’t care. Do whatever you want.

I wanted to have a back and forth on this one. Let’s have a debate. What are your thoughts about Creatine HCL?

I never tried it.

What’s something that we can debate about? You and I have very similar minds. We’re like, “Go, go, go.” We’re thinking of things.

I am an over-thinker.

How were you with school? Did you go to college?

I did. I have a Bachelor of Science.

What is your Bachelor’s in?

It’s in Health Education.

I’m in Exercise Physiology. We can talk about this. What are your thoughts on organic foods?

I don’t eat them as much as I should.

Where does that come from?

It’s probably better. Why not? I don’t think you need it for everything like bananas.

There’s a bunch of stuff that’s come out saying that, “This isn’t good or that isn’t good. Organics are not even as organic as you thought they were. They use more stuff.” What are your thoughts? Jordan Syatt, Gary Vee’s trainer, he made a post about this and he was talking about it. He was like, “I hate to tell you, but this is an unbiased opinion. The truth is that organic is not as organic.” Don’t quote me on that. It’s something similar to that, but organic is not really organic as everyone thinks it is.

I feel like things come out like that all the time like, “Coffee’s terrible for you. Coffee’s great for you.” I love coffee. Starbucks is crap. I still drink it if I have to, but I just like the small coffee shops. They have better coffee or even my Nespresso.

How much caffeine do you have a day?

I do like half decaf, maybe two half decafs or one cup.

What’s the point of having decaf? Is there any reason? Are there any benefits?

I do have so I don’t have too much caffeine and then I can have two.

You really love coffee. When people get decaf, what is the point of it?

Maybe it’s the taste.

Is it good for you? Are there any health benefits?

I don’t know. They just call it different stuff.

CUE 45 | Being A Mom

 

Do you play sports?

No, I’m a bodybuilder.

Do you like sports?

Yeah.

What’s your favorite sport?

I would say football. I was a cheerleader when I was growing up.

Can you do a split?

I used to be able to. I need to work on that.

I can do a split. I almost tear my groin every time, but I go 100%. Do you like hockey?

It’s okay.

This is some good shit right here. Why don’t you like hockey?

I used to go to hockey when I was little. It was fun.

You need some more spice with the sports.

Sports aren’t my forte.

What’s your forte? Is it blogging, clothing, your baby?

Yeah, it’s my baby. I have so many different interests.

What do you want Grayson to be when he grows up?

I hate that question. He can be whoever he wants to be and I’ll support him.

What if he wants to be an astronaut?

I’ll let him be an astronaut.

You ask a kid and you’re like, “What do you want to be?” They’re like, “I want to be a firefighter. I want to be an astronaut?” You go to that one kid like, “I want to be a social media influencer that wins the Olympia in 2024.”

My friend has a six-year-old, she’s like, “I want to be a YouTuber.” I’m like, “What is life these days?”

What are your thoughts of fitness on YouTube? Do you watch anybody?

Sometimes, I don’t even know. I don’t watch that much YouTube. I feel like I watch more of the beauty stuff or random.

I never understood the beauty side of YouTube and social media.

That’s how I learned to do makeup. I didn’t know how before.

As a woman, what are your thoughts on makeup? For yourself, you love makeup. For me, I’m more into natural beauty.

Many men say that.

What’s the problem with that?

There’s nothing wrong with that.

How many men say that?

Men are like, “I love the natural woman,” and then you go on their Instagram and they’re not natural at all. It’s literally butt implants, breast implants.

Nothing beats the feeling of knowing that you are growing a human being inside you. Click To Tweet

Are there are a lot of people with butt implants?

It’s either that or the injections. That’s a thing apparently.

It’s injections of what?

I’m not into it that much, but I know you can get injections into your butt.

I want to talk about supplements. As a mom, are there any supplements that you recommend or think like, “It’s probably better to take this. It’s probably better to take that.” Is there anything at all like Ashwagandha? Have you heard of ashwagandha?

I take it.

Is there something that you’re like, “This is exactly what needs to be taken during pregnancy and then after pregnancy?”

It’s Prenatals.

What are Prenatals?

It’s a big mix of vitamins. Mostly it has foliate, the natural form of folic acid.

Does your doctor tell you to do that?

Everyone knows to take Prenatals. When you’re breastfeeding too, it’s beneficial.

How long do you breastfeed for?

However long you want. The World Health Organization recommends two years.

Does it hurt?

In the beginning it hurts.

What hurts about it? Is it like biting on your nipple?

You get scabby and raw and bleeding at some point. The baby’s sucking on your titty.

I’ve never even thought about that.

Breastfeeding is hard. I liked it but it was so stressful. I had such bad anxiety over it like, “Is he getting enough milk? Is he latching correctly?” You always have to be there to breastfeed. Your boobs start shooting out milk and they get thick and hard once you have a lot of milk and you just press it. It hurts even to be full of milk. Breast milk is the most nutritious. It’s amazing. I tasted it. It tastes like fruit.

Did you taste your own breast milk?

I did a tiny bit.

Is that normal?

I think for sure it’s normal. You’re not going to drink it. You should try it sometime. I don’t breastfeed anymore. If I had some saved, I would give it to you but I don’t.

Are you going to donate it?

You can donate breast milk. It’s the best nutritious food. The woman’s body is amazing. I stopped breastfeeding months ago and if I squeeze, I can still get a little bit of it. If there are moms reading, nothing is TMI when you’re a mom.

What are the struggles of being a mom that people don’t even know about? Let’s talk about the journey of after you have your baby because everyone thinks, “You have your baby like it’s whatever.”

Everyone goes through different things. I didn’t tear that much in my vagina. Some people tear from their vagina hole to their butthole.

What is tearing?

It’s when a six to ten-pound baby comes out of your vagina. Imagine a baby’s head, it’s like centimeters. You dilate to ten centimeters before you push the baby out, which is a lot. It’s like a bagel.

How brutal is it?

I got an epidural so I couldn’t feel anything, but I pushed him out in fifteen minutes. Some people take hours. It depends.

CUE 45 | Being A Mom

 

Isn’t an epidural bad for the baby? Didn’t they say that? Is it bad for the mom, for the hormones or something?

They say it could pass drugs to the baby, but I don’t know.

You don’t believe in that? You just needed to get the baby out.

I was trying to do all-natural with no epidural, but it was all in my back.

What do you mean it was all in your back?

If the baby’s facing down, he’s the right way. If he’s facing up, you have back labor. When the baby is coming out, they arch their neck back. If they’re facing up, it pinches on your back nerves. When you have back labor, it’s ten times worse than when they’re facing the right way. He came out sunny side up they call it, which is his face is facing up instead of down. You poop on the table usually. I did for sure. I had a mirror that was the only way I knew.

You had a mirror of you pooping?

I watched Grayson come out of my vagina. It was really cool. They’re like, “Do you want a mirror?” I’m like, “Yeah.” It was a big mirror so I could see him coming out. It was awesome.

I’ve learned about the ripping of the butthole. Matt’s going to text me. He’s going to be like, “What the fuck?”

He saw it all. He saw me poop on the table.

You women with kids are all about them. This is what I’m talking about. This is what makes Brittany so amazing to the audience. She’s showing up for everybody.

No one talks about it, but it happens.

What is that feeling? What are your thoughts during pregnancy? Having Grayson inside of you from the beginning, what are those feelings throughout? I can only imagine sleeping and there’s a baby inside of me.

It’s the coolest feeling in the world to know that you’re growing a human. There’s nothing that beats it. There are many things about pregnancy that’s hard like you get so big. I could barely walk in the last trimester because I had bad pelvic pain. The baby’s usually super active when you’re chill, so at night having a party. I have so many videos of him kicking my belly. I loved every second of it. I love being pregnant. Some women hate it. There are some things that I hate.

What are the things that you don’t like?

I was really sick in the first trimester. I couldn’t even leave the bed for some days. It felt like you had the worst hangover in the world that you couldn’t throw up and you were like that all day. Some people get no morning sickness. I had a lot.

Did you throw up a lot too?

I didn’t throw up at all. I almost wished that I could throw up. Do you know when you throw up and you feel better? I couldn’t throw up, but I felt really hung over the whole day.

I’d rather feel nauseous and not throw up.

I used to be afraid of it.

I used to be afraid too. My first ever time was in seventh grade and I only threw up once in my life. Not only did it come, but it came harder than it ever has before. I threw up a long time ago. I threw up when I was 24 or 23.

That doesn’t matter because we don’t know your age.

I threw up for the second time. When I was in Denver, Colorado, I didn’t know that I was drunk, but I found out that I was because once I left, I was like, “What in the world’s happening?” I threw up and I’ve only thrown up three times in my life. How many times have you thrown up?

I’m probably more than that. I remember throwing up when I was a kid.

Maybe I’ve thrown up four times.

Some women throw up all the time. They throw up nonstop. Sometimes they have to go to the hospital and get rehydrated.

That’s scary.

Pregnancy can be really crazy.

A lot of people don’t even respect moms.

It’s hard to be a mom.

I’m more talking about the pregnancy side, having someone grow inside of you. If it weren’t for you, if it weren’t for mothers, for women, there wouldn’t be a world.

It’s birthing them and then raising them, it’s a whole life.

As you are in a relationship and you grow together, you grow on your own and you also go through different life experiences. Click To Tweet

What are some of the struggles after you have the baby and everything? Normal life things, like you have work to do. The first couple of months, how is that, the whole shebang?

You’re breastfeeding, which is hard to get the hang of it and you’re doing it constantly when they’re little. Lack of sleep was really crazy. I would have died if I didn’t take naps. They feed every two hours when they’re little, even in the night.

For how long?

It could be fifteen minutes each side even. Sometimes you finish breastfeeding and then an hour-and-a-half later you got to breastfeed again. That’s hard and then you’re starving because you burn so many calories when you’re breastfeeding.

Were you eating a lot?

I was starving. I would have to eat in the middle of the night.

You’re burning a lot more calories where people don’t realize that.

You need to keep your milk supply up. It’s hard because your whole life turns upside down. It’s different. This little tiny human need you to live, so it’s everything. It’s the lack of sleep. You feel like you’re not yourself because you’ve just had a baby. Your body is not what it used to be. Your boobs are giant, producing milk, leaking everywhere. You don’t feel sexy post-pregnancy. You feel like you’re a cow almost. It’s hard and you don’t know what you’re doing. Most moms don’t know what they’re doing. We don’t know about wake times. I don’t know about wake times. How often do they nap? They sleep a lot, but then the house is a mess.

How do you take care of yourself throughout all of this?

It’s hard. If I didn’t have Matt, I really can’t.

There are a lot of single moms out there that literally don’t even have anybody.

Me being a single mom now is so different than if I was a single mom from the beginning. I have a friend who her baby daddy left when she was 38 weeks pregnant and she’s been doing everything from day one. I was like, “You are literally Super Woman. I truly can’t imagine.” She’s been doing it by herself. There were many times too where I wanted to cry because he wouldn’t stop crying. I didn’t know what to do. Matt was so calm. When my water broke, I was like, “Get the fucking car.” I was freaking out. I thought I was going to be so calm and he was like, “Calm down, everything’s going to be okay.” I’m like, “You’re pissing me off with how calm you are. The contractions hurt so bad.” It was hilarious.

What is that like for a dad after you have the baby?

I think dads are very disconnected to the children. Even some moms, like when Grayson came out of me, I was like, “This is the love of my life. I’ve never been more in love than I have been with this child.” That’s how I felt. Some moms don’t feel that way, which is totally fine. Some moms don’t feel that connection to their children, but dads especially they didn’t grow the baby. They don’t know them yet. When the babies are so little, they don’t have a personality. They don’t smile at you. It’s hard to because you want them to smile. Grayson started smiling at four months or something. You feel like, “This is all worth it,” type thing. In the very beginning, they just eat, shit, cry and sleep. It’s hard and you feel like, “What is my life?” For dads, it’s hard for them to connect with the baby. I think they’re there to support the mom. Matt was like that. I let him sleep in a lot but if I needed help, he helped me so much. He would cook for me and be like, “Make sure you’re eating.” He did a good job of taking care of me, which I think is the best thing that dads can do is support a mom.

To anyone that ever has a baby and you’re a guy, be prepared. Even in my mind, I would not even sleep. I’d be like, “What do you need?” I’d sit in the room, I’d be like, “Is the baby going to choke? Is he good? I’m going to go to sleep. I can’t go to sleep.” It’s different for a mom because as a dad you want to build that relationship with your son or daughter. I feel like for me it’s like, “How do I do that if I’m the one that didn’t carry him or her? How do I do that if they don’t even know who I am for a certain amount of time?” Because they do have a connection with you that’s a little bit different.

You can do skin-to-skin with the baby too. Matt did that a little bit. When the baby comes out of you, you don’t want to have a shirt on and they get that skin-to-skin connection.

How shredded was  was Matt at that time?

He was the one who had the cravings.

That’s what I’ve heard is that the male gains weight, goes through this emotional run.

He was still shredded for sure.

That’s very interesting because I think once we’re connected in any way, shape or form, friends or whoever it is, we take on a lot of their traits and characteristics. That’s the beautiful thing about having a baby. One last thing I want to ask. Usually I ask the question of if you were at a dinner table and you can invite any three people except for anybody in your family, cousins, nobody like that. Who would they be? I want to let evolve this a little bit. If you could choose three people for Grayson to be sitting at a table at the age of twenty years old, who would you select for him?

It can’t be any of his family, even my grandma?

No, you can’t do that.

He’s not going to meet her.

I can’t believe you said he’s not going to meet her.

He’s met her, but she turned 99. He’s not going to have an actual conversation.

How is she doing?

She’s pretty good. She’s still kicking it. My brother’s taking care of her.

Where does your brother live?

He’s in South Florida with her. His name is Brendan.

South Florida, that’s where you’re from and she’s down there. That’s retirement century. There’s so much retirement there and that’s cool, she’s 99. That shows that she’s got good traits. She’s one of the four.

Can I pick Jesus?

CUE 45 | Being A Mom

 

You’re the first person ever to say that.

I would want to talk to Jesus.

We were talking about a lot of aggressive stuff. That’s cool, Jesus at the table. Pick two other people.

I want to say someone successful and interesting like Elon Musk or something. I like him. He’s cool. He’s smart.

What do you want for your son?

I want him to learn.

You want Jesus.

He can learn from Jesus.

Jesus was shredded. I think that Jesus had a six-pack to be honest. What are your thoughts?

I don’t know because he drank bread and wine and soup.

You have two more people. What are you doing?

I don’t know why I hate this question. How about you?

For Grayson, I would probably pick Derek Jeter. Derek Jeter has represented a lot of incredible stuff for sports.

Gary Vee, that’s I want.

Not even The B Meyers. It’s cool.

You can be the fifth.

I like Derek Jeter because he was never an asshole in sports. You even know who he is. Do you watch baseball?

I used to. We used to go to baseball games when I was little.

The majority of people if they don’t even watch baseball, they know who Derek Jeter is because he’s always been an inspiration to other people and he’s not a crazy athlete. He’s a smart guy, but he’s always worked extremely hard for many years in the league. That’s cool to grow up like that. I think that would be very inspirational. Those are your four people: Jesus, Gary Vee, Elon Musk and your great grandma.

You picked Derek Jeter.

You asked me to pick Derek Jeter. You said pick somebody. I said, “Derek Jeter.” You’re like, “No, don’t want him.” I’m like, “Thanks for shooting me down.” I think about that a little bit more when you leave because you can think about who you are, what you represent in a way. It’s all about your growth. That’s what it’s about like dinner table, sitting there with four people that you’ve always wanted.

It’s personal growth, intelligence, history.

For me, at one point it was Donald Trump. It was Gary Vee. I would even love Putin. That’s all I wanted to ask. To summarize, thanks for coming on. This is super exciting. We could talk about so many different things.

We could have talked for a few hours.

We started killing it, smacking it. If you’re someone who maybe you want a family or maybe you’re single and you want to be in that relationship. You want to find someone that loves you. Like myself, I’m single. For me, it all about staying true to yourself, stay intentional like you are with social media and the way you are with your son, how you share it to the world. Be you. There’s no reason why you shouldn’t create yourself, create you. There’s no reason why you can’t find someone that you love and eventually marry, have a kid with and that loves you back. Don’t give in to society on saying like, “You have to get married in this amount of time or you have to have a baby. You have to have this timeframe.” Do what feels right for you. Don’t second guess it because second-guessing is what steers you off the path towards success, whatever that success looks like, whether that is having a baby, whether that is a job, whatever it is. Stay on path.

Trust yourself because, for example, I’m a single mom now. I didn’t think that was going to happen and people were like, “You should have been married first.” I’m like, “It felt right to both of us. I don’t regret that because it felt right to me at the time.”

That’s an amazing advice. Don’t promise everyone like, “I’m not going to be a single mother. I’m not going to be a single father.” You don’t know. Life never turns out the way you think it will ever. Go with the flow and trust your gut. That’s all you can do. Brittany, where can they find you on social?

@BrittanyLesser or @BrittLesser on Instagram. It’s the same with on YouTube. My blog is BrittanyLesser.com.

You’re coming out with some cool stuff. I love talking about it. It’s beautiful. Thank you so much for coming on. It’s cool to meet another Floridian like myself. Thanks so much for coming here to Denver, Colorado to share a little bit more. To summarize what we talked about, we dove a lot into what it means to be a mom and what it means to show up as someone in this world that is empowered. It’s all about Hera. Do you want to explain what Hera is? It’s about empowerment. It’s being a mother. What is your representation of Hera?

Live in your truth. Being yourself, focusing on growth on yourself but also being the best person and the best mom you can be.

You could check us out on Spotify, also iTunes, one of the best platforms to host podcasts on. If you ever want to throw a review in there, ask a question or whatever, I would love to see what you say, what you’re asking. Also send me a DM on Instagram with anything @TheBMeyers. You can check me out on Snapchat BMeyersWR, YouTube, whatever. Thank you so much for reading another episode of the show. It’s been a ball. Brittany, thank you one last time for coming on. We’ll see you next time. Peace.

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About Brittany Lesser:

CUE 45 | Being A MomBrittany is a NASM certified personal trainer, Online Coach, ACE Group Fitness Instructor, YouTuber, Sponsored Athlete, Nationally Qualified Bikini Competitor, and has obtained her Bachelor of Science from the University of Florida. Brittany is also a model and actor based in Los Angeles, California.

Brittany’s passion for health and fitness, as well as her passion for helping others, has combined and allowed her to make her dreams a reality of doing what she loves. She pours her all into every aspect of her career, and hopes to grow even more in hopes of reaching more people by inspiring and motivating them to be their best selves.

Episode 46: Are You Working Hard Enough?

 

When you have a certain goal, training is very important to achieve it. The question is, are you training or working hard enough? What does working hard enough even mean? In this episode, explore the concept of hard work as it relates to consistency, discipline, and working smart towards reaching your goals and getting that result that you’ve been working for.

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Are You Working Hard Enough?

Pushing Past Impossible

What I want to talk about is something that I see pretty often in the gym and that is not training hard enough. I want you to ask yourself the question, are you training hard enough? What does hard enough even mean? Here’s the thing, you might have a different goal than I. For me, I’m still prepping and I step on stage for Men’s Physique. If you don’t know what that is, it’s a bodybuilding competition. You got to lose as much body fat as possible. You try and keep on as much lean muscle tissue and you step on stage all greased up and tanned up, which is going to be my first. I’ve been prepping for a show. My goal is different than yours. My hard work might be different than yours.

Your hard work might be less reps or it might be a little bit less amount of days or a little bit amount of days per week. It’s frequency. Mine might be a little bit more frequency and a little bit more sets and more volume or more hypertrophy training. You have to figure out your goal first before you ask yourself that question. “You know what your goal is, great. Let’s dig into it.” Working hard enough, as I said, is coming off that goal, which is all dependent on that result that you’ve been working for, whether it’s for six months, a year, two years or three years, but the consistency of it and nothing less. It’s the consistency of that work that you’ve been putting in to reach that goal.

CUE 46 | Working Hard

 

The consistency is half and maybe even just a quarter of how hard you’re working to get to that achievement. Consistency is there. If you’re going to the gym three times a week, four times a week, you’re getting your workouts and you’re getting your nutrition in and you’re focusing in on everything you need discipline, the word discipline, then you’re on the right track. If you’re cutting your reps short and if you’re giving up on your technique. If you feel like at the end of your workouts when you could be doing one or two sets more or another exercise or you should be doing another exercise more but you’re giving up and letting go, that’s something that you may need to look at as not working hard enough.

 

Working hard and working smart should also be placed in the same conversation because you could work as hard as possible to stress your body. Remember, it’s all about stimuli. The more stimulus that you’re putting your body under, different types of stimulus, the more active and more you’re going to be able to transform. It’s science. It’s exercise physiology. It’s biomechanics and kinesiology. A stimulus is like one of the most important factors when it comes to building your body. If you’re giving up or giving out on all the extra stimulus that could be on your body during that time, you might not be building the muscle that you want. You might not be burning the fat that you want. You might not have the body that you’ve always been wanting. A lot of the times we think we’re giving it our all, but in reality we’re coming up one or two reps short.

You’re not truly working hard enough until you're consistent and you’re disciplined. Click To Tweet

I know from my personal life at the beginning of the first half of my training career, I’ve been training for several years. The first half, I didn’t truly understand what failure represented. I didn’t understand that nor did I understand what training hard enough meant. I thought I knew what training hard enough was until a coach pushed me further than I ever have been before. Once I got to that ceiling, my new coach pushed me even further than where that ceiling was for me before. Soon enough, I kept on going further and further and I was like, “My body is capable of way more than I thought.” As I was achieving more and more with my training in the gym, at the park with my bodyweight training and the whole shebang, I became quicker. I became more explosive. I became stronger.

CUE 46 | Working HardMy physique developed even more in specific areas that didn’t even know about. Ever since being on this prep for bodybuilding, my exhaustion levels have been through the roof. I’m tired, lower calories, lower carbs, lower fats, lower a little bit higher proteins, but lower fats and lower carbs. Because of my discipline and because of my work ethic, I’ve been able to achieve more and set personal records even more when I’m exhausted. When you ask yourself, are you training hard enough, you might as well say no because there’s always more. It’s like if you’re building a business and you reached the $1 million mark or you reached a six-figure mark in a year. That’s a huge mover, but is that enough?

More than the word enough because it might be enough for you, but are you satisfied? Do you want more? Do you want the next thing? We can keep on telling ourselves like, “I don’t want seven figures, but seven figures would be nice.” When you hit seven figures, you’re like, “I want multi seven figures. I want eight-figures. I want to build this. I want to build that.” It’s almost as if it never is enough. The satisfaction comes when you’re putting in all of the work. It’s smart work and you’re not just hitting fifteen repetitions of max reps to do it, to say you’re working hard, but rather you’re strategic. You’re working smart. You have your rest periods. You have your repetitions. You have everything there.

You’re accomplishing everything that you need and maybe even doing a little bit more than what you thought was possible. That is truly working hard. That consistency word that I use at the beginning of this show is freaking important. It’s so important because you’re not truly working hard enough until you’re consistent and until you are disciplined. You can go into the gym three times per week, but you know you should be hitting the gym five times per week. Those three times per week, you’re training hard. The fact of the matter is the consistency is in there. Are you working hard enough? Absolutely not. You have to first define your goal. Secondly, create that strategic plan. Set it up for yourself. Execute number three and four, push your limits. Push it a little bit further.

Don’t just work hard; work smart. Click To Tweet

Here’s the thing. With working extremely hard, are you working hard enough? I love that question. With the extreme work that you’re putting in, the dedication and the consistency of the discipline, it’s the same for rest. Are you working hard enough with your rest? When you’re told to rest or you’re telling yourself to rest or you need to rest or you need to be drinking enough water and all that stuff, that all goes into your work ethic. It’s a discipline. If you’re not disciplined, you’re not working hard enough. Sometimes we needed to have that reality check. Did I put in the work necessary?

Don’t get me wrong. If you’re training and you want to be active and fit and healthy, you don’t need to kill your body in the gym. There’s a difference between a legit bodybuilder or powerlifter or an Olympic lifter or a CrossFit athlete or professional athlete in correlation with someone that wants to walk around feeling good and looking in the mirror and saying, “I have abs. I have cool shoulders.” There’s a huge difference. You don’t need to push yourself to failure and you don’t need to do undulating periodization, progressive overload and all these different things if you want to be healthy. Go in there, get some exercise in and leave. You’re good. Get your cardiovascular system strong, get your muscles strong, get your joints, ligaments, everything strong, stretch and feel good.

CUE 46 | Working Hard

 

Go to do yoga, be social, but also go out and drink and enjoy yourself if you want a drink. Hang out with friends. You don’t have to work out five or six days a week. You can work out four days a week. You can work out three days a week. I suggest four at the very least, but that’s it. It’s as simple as that. One last time, “Are you working hard enough?” There’s also this misconception that if you are trying to achieve a specific physique, you have to train until failure. You have to put yourself too to the end where your legs are shaking that you can’t walk out of the gym. It’s not true. You can adapt in many different ways. You can lift heavier and still have a great amount of volume. You can go more towards hypertrophy training to build size. You’re going to have a lot of volume.

At the same time, you can decrease the volume and still see incredible results. Your body needs to be overpowered in a way or surprised to be able to adapt. That’s the whole point of adaptation. I don’t know if you’ve heard of the gas theory, but it’s basically where your body is alarmed by stimuli. All of a sudden, it starts to adapt the stimuli and you start getting crazy strong. You’re building an incredible body and all these different things. Your lifts are going up. It’s alarmed again. It’s exhausted. It goes into this exhaustion state. It’s that point of overtraining. You don’t want to do too much because it’s a cycle that needs to be repeating itself. Are you working hard enough? It encompasses variation. Switching things up, changing the stimulus so that your body can adapt again and again, but you don’t want to do it too much.

You don’t want to confuse your body too much where it can’t progressively overload. It’s a one-step at a time process. It’s a journey. It’s like the hero’s journey. Have you ever heard of the hero’s journey? I’m not going to get into that. You should look it up. Go look up the hero’s journey. You got to be beaten down to rise and become your hero physically, mentally and spiritually. It’s a three-way street. I don’t think even that there’s even such thing. I like saying it though, but yet do you work even hard enough? I believe we’ve answered the question now. It starts with being smart. It goes with hard work. The smarter you are and the more educated you are, that wasn’t very educated.

The more educated you are, the more you’re going to be able to map out or strategize the plan of action to your goals because you have a goal. If you’re learning, you’re educating and you’re getting there, all you got to do is execute and you win. That’s that. Thanks for tuning in. Again, ask yourself that question and ask all your friends that question. Ask your coach, your mom, your dad, your cousin, your employer or whoever. You can ask the president of the United States, “Do you work hard enough?” Maybe not the president, don’t do that. I’m pretty sure he’s working hard. I am several days out for my first ever men’s physique competition. I have been counting my macros and dieting for months and months. I can’t wait for it to be over. At the same time, I’m enjoying the process because it’s discipline and the consistency of my hard work has been there and I have not given up and that’s what this process is all about.

Again, thanks for tuning in for another CreateU Experience. Go to CreateUNutrition.com to pick up your Greens powder and your Creatine HCL and Probiotics. We have even more innovative products coming very soon. These are top of the line with buzz reviews all around the internet. It’s not just about fitness, it’s about lifestyle. It’s about bringing your vision to life and igniting your breakthrough. That’s what we’re all about at CreateU. Thanks for tuning in. I’ll see you next time.

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Episode 44: Becoming A Freelancer And Taking The Leap with Alex Callahan

 

Life is plagued with numerous options, making it hard for us to make decisions. For Alexandria Callahan, she always knew that she wanted to be free from options and living life her way. This lifestyle blogger, yoga instructor, and graphic designer teaches us the importance of self-love and doing what feels right for us instead of letting others dictate our flow. Through yoga, she has rediscovered herself and was able to create her own life structure. Sharing some insights about working as a freelancer versus working in a cubicle 9 to 5, she encourages us to live life however we want. Learn more from Alexandria and her perceptions on how we can maximize self-love in this episode.

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Becoming A Freelancer And Taking The Leap with Alex Callahan

Betting It All On You

I’m so excited that you are here because we’re going to be digging deep into a lot of different topics. When you review this show on iTunes, you get seven free gifts from myself. We are welcomed by Alex Callahan. This beautiful woman is so incredible. She holds a lot of expressions and that’s where yoga comes from. She’s also a freelancer with many different types of projects, even graphic design. That’s creative within itself. I wanted her to come on here so that we can discuss a few things about her, but also tap into schooling and going that freelance way and taking that next step.

How are you?

I’m amazing. You’ve been doing yoga for how long?

For a few years.

How did it all start? Why did you want to do yoga?

I used to play soccer competitively.

Many soccer players come on this show. I’m like, “Everyone’s a soccer player.”

I was playing soccer and I got hurt. I tore a tendon and ligament in my ankle. I was out, had surgery and got back into it. I was struggling a little bit to go out into running. My gym class, I used to not go that much to it and the teacher said that we could make up for classes by going to a yoga class or to a fitness studio. Instead of having my AM class, I’d sleep in a little bit and then at nighttime, I would go to yoga every day. I made a pattern of it. I was going through a pretty hard time in my life when I started doing yoga. My father had passed away. I was having a pretty rough time with eating and lots of different things. Yoga gave me this space where instead of people telling me what to do in my life and telling me where I should go, I could go there and figure it out for myself. Yoga holds this special place of holding space for you to grow in whichever way you need to grow without people telling you what to do. You’re doing the movements, but it’s all about that space you find in your head while you’re doing them.

That’s where you find a lot out about yourself.

It was the beginning of my addiction to growth and wanting always to learn more about myself, my patterns and being able to work through things in the way that was best for me at each time whatever came into my life.

Does your dad have a big growth mindset?

Yes, he did. He was super social and friendly with everyone. He grew up in New York, and then we moved to Boston, Oregon and then Seattle. He became the president of the Seattle Youth Soccer Association. He was in charge of all the soccer in Seattle and he had his own business with a partner. He was definitely in the growth mindset by doing those things and taking these different ventures on.

Who is your mom to you?

She has a big personality and she loves to talk. She is independent and smart. She’s an incredible businesswoman and was an incredible role model as well. Between my mom and my dad, she was driven and he always told me that I could do whatever I wanted to. It was ingrained in me that anything I want to do, I put my mind to it and I can do it. I grew with this mindset of like, “The world’s my oyster,” which I’m super grateful to have. I think a lot of people don’t have that. By having that, it gives me the confidence to make new friends, new relationships, try new ventures and not let fear take me back from that.

Once you have a strong foundation and relationship with yourself, you have the foundation for everything else in your life. Click To Tweet

The world’s also my oyster. I think the world is everyone’s oyster. Life is in all of our favors if we choose to be. Going through that, losing your dad, it was tough. How do you think that benefits your life? His passing away isn’t a benefit. What came out of it that you could see were positives for yourself?

It made me experience a lot of things I wouldn’t have experienced otherwise. After my father passed away, I became independent and social where I didn’t like to be home. I was never home and I was always doing things, whether that be hanging out with friends, going to the gym, doing yoga, going on friends, partying, the whole spectrum of things. Because of that and always be out experiencing things, I grew a lot at a young age and I became very independent. I was doing anything I wanted to do. I would always bend the rules to do what I wanted to do and became who I was because of that. I started taking the bus around downtown and partying stuff when I was in sixth grade, which is young. I was twelve or thirteen.

Were you drinking alcohol?

I wasn’t drinking alcohol until later in middle school. When I was in sixth grade, my mom went out of town and I threw a party.

When I was in sixth grade, I was playing Nintendo 64. When my parents went out of town, I went with them.

It’s because I like to experience. I had a party where it was all high schoolers there because I had this friend that was older than me and she goes, “My mom’s out of town.” The cops ended up coming in and I ended up running away because I was scared. Because of him passing, I experienced a lot of things I wouldn’t have otherwise. I think it pushed me to challenge myself, which I felt horrified. My mom didn’t think I was going to make it through high school, but I did. I’m doing great.

What you learned was structure and you need structure to your life.

I feel like I don’t need structure. I feel like I don’t like structure and I like the freedom of being able to do what I want. That’s one of the reasons I started freelancing. That’s one of the reasons that once I graduated from school I was like, “I can’t work 9 to 5. This isn’t for me.” The most important thing for me is to have freedom of time. It’s for me to do the things that I want to do because I only live once. I don’t want to spend my entire life doing things other people are telling me to. I want to do what feels right for me and it’s contributing the way that I want to contribute.

Have you ever thought that maybe structure is going to aid in you being able to do more quickly than being more adventurous all the time?

I’m good at planning my time. I do have structure but it’s not the same thing every day. I plan out my weeks sometimes by the hour. I definitely have structure, but there’s so much freedom within that structure. It’s a structure that I’m creating instead of someone putting that structure on me.

What she’s saying is that it’s not that she doesn’t have a structure in her life, she has structure but she comes from a freeway. You’re a freelancer to life. You like to enjoy things, be adventurous, do different things, try new things and not be held back where you can’t do those types of things. At the same time, in those new adventures, you like to structure things and make sure that you had the best experiences possible.

I like to do what I wanted to but I like to make sure that I’m succeeding in those by setting up a foundation for myself where I can do that.

Make sure you take that into consideration. The structure is a good thing in those opportunities that have presented itself and that you’re taking on. Did your father pass away when you were younger?

Yes, I was in sixth grade.

CUE 44 | Becoming A Freelancer

 

You had this learning period that you went through where you didn’t have someone there that was demanding you or like a father figure that would be there for you. Was there someone that did play that role in your life?

My mom but besides that, I had a lot of good guy friends that took on the brotherly role as I grew up. I’m extremely close with them and love them to death. They’re like my family. I created my life. I decided that since my dad passed and I didn’t want to be at the house, I made a family in my friends and I became close to them. I made every relationship that I had, for the most part, I still have and I keep those connections because they mean so much to me. I was also that person for myself. I didn’t necessarily have that father figure.

You found the characteristics in other people to encompass. That’s great that you learned how to shift because a lot of people don’t. If you’re alone, find people that support you. Your mom isn’t going to be able to provide all that energy. There’s no way that they can fit that place for all of it. She could just be a loving mom and support you. That’s all that I’m sure she wanted to do and make it the best.

She would try to set all these rules, but somehow I always found my way around them because it’s a teenager thing.

I disagreed with you and I shouldn’t have because a teenager thing, that’s our self like, “We do that. Anybody can do that.” We always find our little curves. There are a lot of teenagers that are probably reading. This is interesting because it all encompasses where you are in freelancing and everything. Are there any other times in your life that you went through a lot or maybe a relationship? Do you have any trust issues with people? Are you held back in certain ways maybe socially? Is there anything that holds you back?

I’ve had two relationships before. My first one was for all of high school, so it was for four years and he became a heroin addict half partway through the relationship. That was hard. He also became homeless.

Do you still know him?

We’re on good terms, but he doesn’t have a phone. While we were in a relationship, I would try to sneak him into my basement and my mom was like, “You can’t have boys sleep over.” I set him up a room in my basement in the back of the storage room. One day my mom came downstairs and found out that I had moved my boyfriend into the house and she was not happy about that.

How old were you?

I was seventeen.

You’ve been through some shit.

It was a lot having that be my first relationship, but it was so great at first and then I couldn’t do it anymore. He wasn’t the same person by the end of it.

What it like when someone is on such a hard drug like heroin?

It wasn’t just that.

You don’t have to go too deep into him what he took but what is it like?

When working with someone, make sure your values align with each other. Click To Tweet

The person you knew just goes away. He had been the most creative person I’ve ever met. He thinks about things in a way that was so inspiring to me. I remember when I first met him, he was looking up philosophy quotes. I had never gotten into them. He changed the way I thought about the world. It was the first time in my life that I thought each person is an entire universe. It changed the way I saw humanity. It changed the way I saw everything and that was such a big deal. It’s completely shifted me. When it ended, I need it to end. It was at the point where I was like, “I can’t do this anymore.” For the longest time in the relationship, I was like, “You don’t leave someone when you love them and if they need you.” That was draining me of my energy and it was at a point where there was nothing left I can do. Our lives were going in separate directions. The relationship after that ended very poorly. It was a bad break up. That definitely around that time I went from one relationship right into another.

That’s tough to do honestly.

When the second one ended, it was all of a sudden my first time being alone in a few years.

How was that being alone? Here’s the interesting part, when you’re a freelancer, you might have a team around you but generally, you’re alone.

The second breakup shifted the way I saw everything as well because I had been very dependent and then all of a sudden, I wasn’t. That transition at first was hard for me and I went through a couple of months where I wasn’t doing so good. I went off the deep end and wasn’t taking care of myself.

What were you doing?

I was drinking a lot and I wasn’t eating. I was getting myself in all these horrible situations where I ended up not just losing a relationship. I started to lose it from friendships because I wasn’t very stable. I went on this road trip by myself. I was supposed to go with a friend to drive from Seattle to Colorado, then something happened and I had to go by myself. It only takes two to three days, but I did it in six. I took my time, I stopped along the way and I had the best time. I recreated this relationship with myself where I went on hikes by myself. I went skinny dipping by myself. I went out to these bars and I made friends by myself when I was in Montana and Wyoming. I did so many things where I had the best time ever.

That started shifting your mind a little bit.

All of a sudden, I realized I didn’t have to worry about anyone else that I was my own person. I could do whatever I wanted. I was like, “I’m an adult now.” I’m free and I can do whatever I want. No one is checking in on me. it was amazing. It was this freeing experience where I realized that the only thing I need is myself.

Do you know how hard of a realization that is?

To have that shift to realize that all I needed was myself and that any new relationship I was going to bring into my life eventually was only going to be something that added on. Everything I have is what I need. I don’t need anything else. If someone was going to come into my life, I wanted to make sure that was a positive addition and not something I needed. I had my own thing going on, that I had a strong foundation, a strong relationship with myself. By having that time alone, I realized that once you have a strong foundation and relationship with yourself, that’s the foundation for everything else in your life. Whether it be your work, working out, things you’re passionate about and your thoughts, if you have that relationship with yourself, everything’s going to be okay because you know you have it in you.

You’ve already created you and you’re creating yourself even more. If you’re reading and you’re feeling stagnant or whatever it is, take the next step and do something on your own and experience some things. Maybe go for a hike, go skinny dipping, maybe move somewhere, do those types of things. You came from Seattle and moved to Denver. Why did you move to Denver?

It was originally for school. I moved here because I knew that I wanted to move. I wanted to go someplace new. I think every time you move you find a new part of yourself. We can find new parts of yourself all the time but for the most part, when you move, it’s putting you in new situations. I always said I wanted a big school, I wanted it to be sunny. I love Colorado and the mountains. I wanted to be able to live outdoors and to explore.

You were able to find that here. When you did move here, things are obviously started shifting for you even more because you took that next opportunity. You started building your life and you’re looking to go to LA or Seattle. Why the difference between the two?

LA is someplace that I’ve wanted to move since I was a little girl. I had this idea where everyone used to tell me like, “You would do great in LA.” I loved it there. Whenever I went there when I was younger, I felt it was home. I felt it clicked. It felt like the right place for me.

CUE 44 | Becoming A Freelancer

 

Why not?

When I also moved away, I realized how much I love Seattle as a city, especially as you get older. It’s a unique place where it has more culture and more of a personality than almost any city I’ve ever been to. There’s the water, the mountains and skiing. There’s so much to it. I feel like whenever I go back, I have a new wave of inspiration and it inspires me to be there.

You make me want to go check out Seattle.

It’s amazing, especially in the summer.

When it’s wet, super sunny and nice weather?

I like rain. Whenever it rains here, I’m smiling and I’m like, “Can I go on a walk outside?”

A lot of people hate the rain. They’re driving slow. They’re running into poles.

I feel like the rain is what you make of it. Like anything else, if you dress for it, you wear a rain jacket, you can still go do stuff in it. I feel like a lot of people have this mindset that when it’s raining, they’re like, “I want to stay inside. I want to watch movies. I want to cuddle up with bae.” That’s what people think when they think of rain and clouds. For me, I’m a big runner. The perfect rainy weather is a nice mist and it’s not a hard rain.

I love how you see all the positive in this stuff. When it rains, I don’t even think of it. I’m like, “It’s raining, it’s another day.” The city shifts during seasons, especially I’ve noticed in Denver is that people shift a lot when it’s a cloudy day out and all of a sudden was a cold day out and everybody’s indoors. I’ve never seen that before. You’re a freelancer and you went to school. Did you graduate with a degree?

Yes, in Graphic Design.

You took that graphic designing onto the streets. You started to freelance, you started to do yoga. How did you make money at first?

I started by teaching yoga and I was doing Instagram as well. I was doing some blogging. I put my website and I would put out graphic design and people started reaching out to me about graphic design work. I started getting jobs. At the time I was doing an internship, I knew that I was like, “As soon as this is done, I’m never doing this again.” I was like, “I’m not going to be sitting in an office all day.”

What type of feelings did it provide to you that you knew like, “This is definitely not something I want in my life?”

I felt I’m a pretty quick worker, but I’m also a perfectionist. When I was in an office all day, I felt like I was required to be there. Even when I finished the work, I had to do extra work and I was like, “I could get as much work done, make as much money, but also do the things I want to do.” Why would I sacrifice my entire day to be drained of my energy sitting at a desk inside, especially doing projects that I’m not choosing? These are projects that I didn’t necessarily believe in all of the clients and what they were doing and I didn’t necessarily want to support that, but it’s a job. It was what I was doing. As a freelancer, I also get to pick and choose if I want to work with someone because it’s not just about the brand or the company, it’s about the people that you’re working with and what their vision is. It’s important that when I’m working with someone in some way, it aligns with my values as well.

There are so many blessings every day, but sometimes we are so focused on things that are not going right. Click To Tweet

What would you say to someone that’s on the fence of like, “I want to be a freelancer,” but they have jobs? Denver seems to be more of a 9 to 5 city. For me, I come from LA. You don’t know who has a job. Does anybody have a job? You’re like, “Chris, are you working?” It’s like, “Never.” I’m like, “What do you do?” It’s like, “I just stay at my friend’s mansion.” To me, I’m always curious. For anyone that’s reading, what would you have to say to them if they’re at a 9 to 5 job and they want to be a freelancer?

If you don’t bet on yourself, no one else is going to. You can take the easy road and work for someone else and know you’re going to have a paycheck coming in all the time, or you can take the risk and do what you love and hope that it works out. If not, you can always figure something else out. Fear kills more dreams than failure ever will. If you don’t try things, you’re never going to know. I felt I’m too young to sell out on myself, to give up on my dreams and to give up on what makes me happy. Because if I’m not doing what makes me happy, then why am I doing it? Because for a paycheck and then that paycheck is so I can continue living in someplace and working the same job.

Would you rather make $3,000 per month of freelancing or $6,000 in a cubicle?

I’d way rather freelance and make less money.

How about $7,000 in a cubicle, $10,000 or make six figures compared to $3,000 freelancing?

If I was making six figures for a year, I would do it. Then I would save that money, quit, do my own thing and have that as a foundation.

That’s where I’m getting at. You see this all the time, people shift when money’s dangling around you, even you but you did it in a strategic way. You were like, “I’m going to use this to propel me in what I want,” which is being adventurous and being a freelancer. What’s the hardest thing about being a freelancer?

It’s always a hustle. I am always looking for more work and then all of a sudden, I have so much work that it’s overwhelming. Between all the different things I’m doing, I constantly feel like I’m hustling. Technically, it’s paycheck to paycheck and always looking for the next job. I know that the more I work and the more clients I continue to have and work with that it’s only going to grow. I have to put in that work to continue to grow as a business, as a person, as a freelancer and as an artist.

It’s the beginning that’s most important.

You have to put in the work. I have to do all the work and I also have to have that self-discipline to plan my time and be like, “I have to get this done.” When I do something, I want it to be good. I’m not going to half-ass it ever.

I love bringing big CEOs and business leaders on the show, but it’s also important to bring people like yourself on here. You’re not making $500,000 a year, you’re hustling. One day you might or maybe one day, you never will. At the same point, you’re living the life. This is successful. Being this happy and positive about life, about rain. Imagine if I was this positive about rain like, “I’m outside and little water particles are smacking my face. This is great. I love life. I’m going to go run. All this moisty mist is all over my face.” The way you live is very inspiring and it brings a lot of joy to other people and that’s what’s most important. You also have bad times. What type of bad times do you have as a freelancer especially?

Sometimes I’ll get in a scarcity mindset where all of a sudden I’ll be super overwhelmed because I’ll take on so much work and then I’m like, “I’m doing this because I want freedom of time, but I’ve taken on more than I can handle but I need to get all done and I want it to be good.” All of a sudden, I get in this mindset of like, “This isn’t right.” The second you start in that downward spiral, it keeps going down until you have to take a step back. I don’t know if you’ve ever heard the story of the black dot where the teacher gave all of the students a sheet of paper and he drew a black dot in the middle and he asked them to explain it. Everyone wrote about the black dot instead of the paper. If you focus on those little dark spots, they’ll pollute your mind and they’ll consume you. You have to take a step back sometimes. Whenever that happens, I have to focus on going outside in nature, taking a walk, doing anything to take a step back and to realize that there’s so much more to be grateful for. There are so many blessings in every single day, but sometimes we’re so focused on the things that aren’t going right that we forget about them.

It’s funny but at the same time this is how our mind works. Some people will be like, “The black dot. You want me to draw a black dot?” You draw a black dot and they would explain the black dot and what it means to the paper. Other people will be like, “The white paper. There’s so much around it. We can create more dots and everything.” You have me who’s literally just like, “How can I even draw a dot?” It doesn’t make any sense. I’m like, “I’m not an artist.” When you draw something, it’s emotion. A dot is a dot. We don’t even see those people that think analytically like that. Those people around us are so important. Those are the people that we should pay attention to as well because they’re the ones that are creating things and inventing things. That allows you as a freelancer to even grow more. The humans in the world like Tony Robbins for instance and how he thinks analytically in those ways. He would think of the white all around the black. It’s important to keep our minds open to all of it and see things from the preparation. If we don’t see it from the preparation, sometimes we lose it at the end. It’s because we didn’t prepare properly or see what we were supposed to be doing and staying present. As a freelancer, you’re doing graphic design, you’re doing yoga. Is there anything else that you do?

Yes, I do adventure and I blog. I go and explore and then sometimes I’ll partner with brands who will end up paying me to wear their content and post about it. I only partner with people who align with my values as well. I’m trying to build that at the same time because my end goal is to be able to live my life and continue to work on growing and that be my job.

CUE 44 | Becoming A Freelancer

 

In social media?

Not just social media. I do workshops as well, which is another thing.

What type of workshop?

Self-love workshops or yoga workshops. What I do is I talk all about quieting your inner critic and reconnecting with yourself. We all have that voice in our head, our ego. You say things to yourself that you would never say to anyone else. You’re usually the meanest person to yourself. It’s about changing that relationship.

I’m such an asshole to myself.

We all are.

Have you ever beat yourself up so much?

Yes, also we have the voice that says, “You’re not good enough.” There are so many voices in your head that’s always telling you you’re either not good enough or that you’re better than something. That’s your ego. It’s that voice that is always comparing. You can let that go because these workshops are supposed to bring that to life. You’re supposed to speak it. Once you can release that shame and hear what you’re saying to yourself, you realize how untrue it is. The workshops are all about that and giving yourself recognition because I think a lot of people don’t give themselves recognition for everything they’ve been through. They don’t give themselves recognition for the things they’re proud of themselves for. There was this one exercise we do where I have everyone write themselves a love letter. It sounds cheesy at first.

Honestly, I believe everybody should do this.

I didn’t even think about it but the first time I did it, I read it out loud and I couldn’t stop crying. I couldn’t even get the words out because I realized the first time I had ever given myself recognition for the things I had been through or how far I’d come. It’s for all those things that you don’t think about. People don’t realize how much they’ve been through and they do, but they don’t think about how far they’ve come. If you think about where you were before and where you are now, all the things you’ve overcome, all the goals you’ve reached, it’s pretty insane. The workshops are all about helping people because by sharing these workshops with people and getting them to reconnect and recreate that foundation with themselves, their life will take off. That’s important to me. That’s what I’ve learned and that’s what I want to share with the world.

You’re filled with a passion and it overflows with so many positive things around you. Do you do any meditation?

I tried to. I have a little app that I use at night.

What app do you use?

It’s called StartRight or something. They’ve got five-minute meditations, ten-minute meditations. I do that. One of my resolutions was to meditate every morning before I look at my phone, before I do any anything that’s electronics, technology. Before I consume anything, I wanted to meditate and then I wanted to journal and create because I think sometimes it’s important to start your day with you.

A lot of us, we started with other things and it takes away from the creativity that’s flowing through our mind. For me, when I wake up, my mind’s racing in fifteen different areas, “I’ve got to do this. I’ve got to get this done. We only had this much time.” Sometimes I flow in and out of this. It’s this flow state of negativity and positivity. When I wake up, I make my bed, I brush my teeth, I meditate, I read a little bit and I do all these different things. I literally feel so good for the rest of my day. When I don’t, I only do half of that stuff. I have a 50% chance of me having that great day that I was going to. I almost think it’s like a percentage system when we wake up. Especially being a freelancer and being someone that is taking the next step in their own life to work for themselves, for anybody else. You need to set yourself up to win. If you don’t, you’re setting yourself up for a lot of failures.

Fear kills more dreams than failure ever will. Click To Tweet

I sometimes skip the meditation, but I try to do it. For that one, I don’t use the app. I use a breathing exercise where I focus on counting on my inhales and exhales or sometimes I’ll count. The second a thought comes into my mind, I’ll start over.

That’s one of the earlier stages of meditation where that’s what you learn.

It’s about recognizing your thoughts realizing that you’re not. I usually journal and my journal usually set intentions for my day because if I don’t do that, I feel like I don’t have the same sense of direction and drive. When I set my intentions, it helps me set goals for myself. It helps me stay aligned with what I need and what I want. Sometimes when my work is done so that I can do things, other times it’s like, “I want to get outside and I want to learn something about myself.”

What are some intentions that you have?

It was to get out of my comfort zone, to be vulnerable and authentic and to embody myself fully.

How can you get so uncomfortable, vulnerable and share something that maybe is holding you back in your life that will create you? Is there something that you don’t talk about? Maybe it’s insecurity. I’ll 100% match it.

Sometimes I feel that inner critic and my voice is like, “You’re fake.” You’re living this life and you’re faking it until you make it. I realized that’s not true. I’ve worked hard to get to where I am and I need to embody myself fully. I feel that these parts of myself that I don’t know when in my life, but I decided that they weren’t acceptable. People wouldn’t like me if I shared them. People wouldn’t want to be my friend if I shared these parts of myself with them. I’ve been stepping into this idea that I need to release any shame I have and fully own up to all of my story and my feelings to know that there’s no certain way to be. There’s not a box I’m going to put myself in. I can’t make everyone happy. If someone doesn’t like me, then they don’t like me. All I can do is show up as my best self and even when it’s not my best self to be okay with that.

One of the things that you’re saying is that you felt you were almost fake to other people?

Not fake to other people. I write a lot of all my captions. I journal a lot and a lot of those come from it. I felt like I felt all these things and I wasn’t applying them. I felt there were all these things that I believed in, that I preached and I wasn’t walking the talk all the time. Sometimes I was fucking up. Sometimes I’m talking about self-love, I’m talking about all these things and sometimes I have the inner critic too. I felt shameful about that. I’m supposed to be teaching this, I’m preaching this, this is something I believe in and I’m passionate about, but that doesn’t mean I’ve overcome this. I’m learning to face the fact that even though I’m preaching this, I’m sharing as I’m evolving. I’ll never be done evolving. For me to accept that I’m always going to be a work in progress and that’s okay to share still what I’m learning about myself, that doesn’t mean that I’m always perfect in those ways. This is what I’m learning and I’m trying to apply to my life.

This is the journey and it’s okay to have a critic. It’s okay to not be in your best practice at every moment of the day because it is not fucking possible. If I were to wake up and people think that I’m 100% speed all the time, every single moment, I would literally have a heart attack and die. I need my rest time. For me, I like to do something where I challenge myself because I like to reverse the pattern. Usually, we practice and we have these critics and the critics bump us off our path. They’re like, “No, you can’t do this. No, you’re going to be judgmental. No, you’re going to be an asshole.” On the opposite side of the spectrum, we have the opportunity to place ourselves in the positions to succeed and bring those practices into play by placing ourselves in those situations. I went to Cheesecake Factory, I went to the basketball game and then immediately after, I started running in all of my dress clothes and everything. I ran for about two miles. I went to box in front of the Capitol. I pushed my body at 12:00 at night.

I do this often because I feel my practice also can be placed into reality. I don’t know what’s going to happen in my life. I don’t know if someone’s going to call me and I’d be like, “I want to do a business deal now at 11:30 at night.” What do I do? I put myself in a stressful situation at that time with all my clothes on. I had boots on, I had everything and I experience a whole different side of me that I never saw before. In some areas, what do you do? Do you ever do that for yourself in some areas?

I try to do something new every day to push myself.

What are you going to do?

I’m going to take it as it comes, but I will do something.

CUE 44 | Becoming A Freelancer

 

Do you yoga in your most stressful times?

Yes.

Imagine if you were driving on the highway and you’re trying to get somewhere. You stopped your car and you did a five-minute yoga flow on the side of the highway.

I’m going to do it.

Those are the type of things that I like to do.

Like I was saying that inner critic saying, “You’re fake.” I’m always very much myself. I’ve never been someone who cares what people think about me, but I care a lot about what I think about myself. I think that’s one of the reasons I was like, “I feel I’m fake because I preached non-attachment. Yet here I am trying to decide where to move and I’m torn.” I’ve always wanted to go to LA but I’m like, “I love Seattle.” I don’t know if I’m doing that because I don’t want to be comfortable.

I’m going to tell you this without a doubt, go to LA. You can go to Seattle whenever you want. You have friends, you have family up there. If you hold yourself back and don’t go to LA, it’s going to be the thought in your mind of, “I want to go to LA.” You’re going to go to Seattle, you’re going to move in, you’re going to be great. It might hold you back in certain ways for a couple of years and finally, you going to be like, “I’m going to go to LA.” All of those couple of years, you could have been in LA and then you could have moved back to Seattle.

LA is the hub to go for a little while. Some people build their lives there. I’ll eventually get a house there. I have a lot of people that I love there. At the same time, I experienced LA for four-and-a-half years, so I moved somewhere else. You go experience that. 100% go and don’t hold back. You’re going to miss out on so many different things for the next a couple of years because you didn’t do it. If that little girl is telling you to do it, that little girl is right. It’s like I want to be in the NFL when I was a kid. That was something that I was pursuing nonstop until I had some shifts. Do I wish that I played in the NFL again? Yes, I do. Do I have some regrets? Maybe a little bit, but no. I do wish I played in the NFL and I don’t want those wishes in my mind. I want to do everything that I’ve ever wanted to do.

The thing for me is sometimes I have to focus on tuning in to my voice. Sometimes I hear everyone else and I’ve noticed that I’m very impressionable and I know that I want to move to LA. Part of me wants to move to Seattle.

Stop talking about Seattle. You can go visit. It’s not a long flight. Trust yourself because you keep on bringing it up like, “I want to go to LA first.” You always bring that up first and then you shift over to Seattle. We don’t need buts in our lives. We need the ands. It’s like, “I’m going to live in LA and I’m going to live in Seattle.” That’s what you need. Not, “I want to go move to LA, but I do want to live in Seattle.” Do it both. To summarize, because we brought a good topic to people and for them to understand. You went through a lot. You lost your dad, you had to grow up quick, you had to find a lot of your own masculine energy by tapping not only to yourself but the environment around you and society. That can be very tough. When you transformed is you moved to Colorado and you took this next step and on this road, you learn about yourself like, “This is possible. I can do this, I can do that.” That’s so special.

From there, you became a freelancer and you went to school and you did all of this stuff. You’re making money and you’re able to live the life that you want through your positive mindset and the alignment to your core being. You’re doing yoga, you’re doing things you enjoy and you’re about to move to LA and move to Seattle. People learn that, “It’s possible for me too.” I believe they truly did. It’s not easy to lose somebody that close in your life. To overcome that, your dad’s so proud. You’re an incredible person and I could see the expression through your yoga. What would you recommend to people going to college? If they’re reading this like, “I want to be a freelancer and I want to do this.” Maybe they should go to college or do you believe that going in and doing the freelance thing is the right move for themselves?

I think freelance is the best move. It depends on what you want to do, but if you want to have a certain job where you have to build those steps to get a degree, then go to school. Personally, I know it sets a good foundation for myself and it taught me a couple of times I wish I had done a specialty program instead of getting a full degree. I wish I had less time doing what I thought I was supposed to do. I thought I was supposed to go to college because that’s what I was always taught. Looking back on it, I feel I learned a lot but I also feel I wasted a lot of time that I could have made it faster. I could have focused, so I’m into health and wellness. I wish I had done different certificate programs in all of my different interests instead of being required to take all these classes that I wasn’t that interested and that I might never use again.

I think you answered it quickly and I want to stop it there because I don’t want people to shift their minds at all. If you want to learn one thing, go learn that one thing. My opinion is you can go to school. You had the experiences, you had the parties. It’s great for socializing and learning like that, networking especially. In some degrees, if you want to become a doctor, you need to go to school. From there if you’re a graphic designer, I don’t think you need to spend $100,000 on schooling.

I’m a graphic designer and yoga teacher. I did not need to go to school for any of those things.

There are specialty programs online. Go and learn.

If you don't bet on yourself, no one else is going to. Click To Tweet

I do social media for people. I did not learn that in school. That’s something you learned from doing it. I think you learn a lot from doing things. If you want to do something, try to do it. Experience it. Find people that do it and talk to them.

If you want to be a graphic designer, don’t feel like you have to go to school. Yes, there are some good programs to go to, but if it is going to be a program you are going to go to go to school, make sure it’s very specific. It’s like, “I want to do 3D work or animation.” Go to school for only 3D animation.

A lot of people go to school to figure out what they want, but if you know what you want, the best way to do it is to live it.

You can go to school at any time. That’s the cool thing.

People think you have to do it in a few years. Some of my best friends went for a year, went to travel for a year-and-a-half and ended up doing the documentary. They went for a semester and then decided to go to a different school. There isn’t a certain way you have to live your life. You can live your life however you want. A lot of people forget that. It’s easy to think that there’s a certain way you’re supposed to do things. You think that there’s this roadmap and often you go to school and you realize there isn’t a roadmap and that you did all of that and you still don’t know what you want. You have to follow your heart and live your own life.

Don’t settle for what society’s telling you to do and create it yourself. Create you, as simple as that. If you’re at a dinner table and you could invite three guests, alive or dead, not anyone that’s a close relative or a family member, who would they be?

Tony Robbins.

Why?

He’s so inspiring and I would love to have a conversation with him because every time I hear him, I feel like my mind expands.

Who else do you get? I don’t want you to think too much about it. I want it to come and then you shoot. That’s the main point of this.

Jessica Olie. She’s on Instagram. I love her writing. It’s beautiful. I love her mind.

What did she do?

She teaches yoga and she started selling her products. She sells mats and sweatshirts. She’s an influencer. She is such a poetic and beautiful writer. As a writer and as a person, I love watching her evolution and how vulnerable she is. Everyone that I would invite is people that inspire me.

Give me the third one. I’ll give you one. Honestly, I would love to have dinner with Hitler. I would want to mindfuck him because I 100% believe I could have, and tap into him and brainwash his mind because what he did is horrific. How he did it is like, “How does one man start this?”

I am not even thinking about a specific person. I would love someone to be apparently fully enlightened. There’s one person, I studied about him and he could literally stop his heart for two minutes. There are pictures of him holding everything on one finger when you were little. He did not do weights and he could control his mind. He studied for years about meditation and not focusing on anything besides the current moment. I would love to meet someone on that level.

CUE 44 | Becoming A Freelancer

 

Maybe even a monk.

I would be so inspired.

That represents who you are and your growth. That’s why I like to ask that question so people can also know it. The chatter in their minds is like, “That’s interesting.” I think it’s very important to learn a little bit more about ourselves by surrounding ourselves with certain people. That’s who you surround yourself with is enlightenment, inspired. I want to say thanks for coming on.

Thank you.

Where can they find you on social?

On Instagram, @AlexCallahan4.

Any products, programs or anything that you sell?

I sell photo presets, which I’ve spent a few years creating to make a cohesive looking feed. It’s a launching base for people that want to create their photos. As a content creator, I care a lot about how things look. Not just visually and how they’re set up perfectionist. This is a starting base for other people that want to do that and want to create what’s in their mind. There’s a link in my bio.

I might have to buy that. I love tapping into other people’s presets and what they create because it’s also an image of your creativity from your own mind.

I’ll stay posted to my workshops because I post on my workshops on there for the self-love ones. I’m hoping to be able to travel and do that and bring them to other cities. Keep your eyes posted.

If you say you will, you go. Check out Alex on her social. Remember, we’re coming here every single week at least one episode, even sometimes two. It’s called QuickTime Friday. That’s something where I tap into a topic and we touch on a few different things. My first ever QuickTime Friday was about my story. Remember what I told you even more in-depth, everything that happened, surgery, sicknesses and pains. Go check that out in the older episode. Remember you can get those seven free gifts. Click on that link to review the show only on iTunes. That’s the main thing and through that link, so make sure you do that. Throw that in your email and we’ll get to you. Thanks for tuning in for another episode of the CreateU Experience. Thank you for joining us and we’ll see you next time.

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Episode 43: Confessing To The World

 

We struggle with a lot of things in life, and handling each of them takes discipline. This is what Brendan Meyers talks about in this episode. Opening up his heart on his struggle of lacking discipline, he shares how he is overcoming that in various aspects of his life. Learn how you, too, can develop discipline in your life as Brendan takes us through his experiences and how he’s developing and applying this value on his team and the stage.

Review this podcast on iTunes using this link — http://www.createuagency.com/podcast-giveaway — and receive 7 FREE gifts —

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Confessing To The World

I hope you’re having an absolutely fantastic day. If you’re not, flip it upside down. If your quarter is on tails, flip it to heads because we are winners here. I’m not saying that tails don’t win, I’m saying head’s right now is the way to go. I want you to stop for a second because I’m about to blow your mind with something that I don’t see very often at all. Actually, I don’t see it at all. I’m going to tell you a handful of my faults and I am going to be honest with you and tell you the things that I struggle with, so that maybe you can take a stand in your life and tell your significant other the things that you struggle with or tell your team the things that you struggle with. Maybe you could tell your mom, your dad or your son or your daughter, whoever it is, your employer. It could be your boss. It could be simply a friend. I want you to go out there like me that I’m about to do with you and lay it all out there. You can say, “These are things that I struggle with.” Why don’t we get started?

One of the biggest things I struggle with is discipline with choosing. It’s extremely hard to choose. It is. I can go buy a food store and I’ve been getting so much better at this. I used not to be able to choose anything. I could look at a Pellegrino and a Perrier, which are two sparkling waters, by the way. It’s carbonated water and absolutely delicious. I love it so much. It suppresses the diet. If you are fasting or anything, it could aid in your success of dieting. I highly suggest that. I can go in there and I could try and pick a Perrier or a Pellegrino. I could be like, “I don’t know. What should I pick?” I can go into two Philly cheesesteak places, even though I don’t eat steak anymore and I could say, “I don’t know if I want this one or that one.”

Talking to someone who has the same problem as you do can be therapeutic. Click To Tweet

If someone asks me, “Do you want to go to this ski park or do you want to go to this ski resort?” I say, “I don’t know.” It’s one of the biggest things that I’ve struggled with in my entire life. I can go back to my family, I go to my history and all these different things. The truth is I lacked that discipline because in many areas of my life, I lacked discipline. The discipline of me choosing, being able to choose, I have problems with it in so many areas. Choosing a plane ticket, I could be choosing a specific taxi, a bird, or a lift, this type of water or this type of water. Some of the practices that I’ve been using is just to do it. Whatever is in my gut, go. It’s like, “Brendan, don’t even think about it, just go.” It’s helped me so much.

CUE 43 | Lack Of Discipline
Lack Of Discipline: Lack of discipline can be a cycle of no return.

 

The truth is I’ve lost a lot because of my indecisiveness. It’s the truth. I’ve lost my past relationship because of my indecisiveness. Because of that learning, that huge lesson, I now do not have problems with relationships or significant relationships and an actual intimate girlfriend type of relationships because of that. It’s because I learned and I go with my gut. It’s masculine energy. A lot of decisiveness is masculinity. Now that’s one fault. Let’s go with the second fault. I have a lot of anxiety. I have trouble “breathing” and you might think, “What? You have trouble breathing? Brendan, maybe it’s because you’re in Denver, Colorado and you’re a mile high, 5,280 feet in the air.” I think that’s how much a mile is. No, I actually have had trouble breathing my entire life, to be honest. It doesn’t come from anything with my lungs, it doesn’t come from anything with my trachea or anything like that. There’s not a problem with my diaphragm. It’s simply because my mind is racing and I overthink and I allow my emotions to take hold. This comes down to discipline once again and communication with myself. Because I’ve gotten so much better at it, I had a huge episode when I was going through a lot of my shit.

The goodness of your heart can outweigh anything else. Click To Tweet

A long time ago, I explained what happened to me is pretty detrimental to my life but absolutely transformational and evolving. I couldn’t breathe and I actually almost passed out. I was hyperventilating. Sometimes I have trouble breathing now, but I have to remind myself. I don’t have to, I get to. I sit there, I think and I say, “Brendan, are you having trouble breathing? Because I don’t think you are. I think you’re over-exaggerating.” All of a sudden, what do you know? I relax or I go for a walk or I take my mind off of it. There’s another “fault,” which I don’t even think it’s a fault. I think it’s something I deal with in my life that I want to get off my chest so that maybe you can relate. It’s as simple as that.

Sometimes I don’t floss at night and I talked about this. Sometimes I’m like, “I don’t want to floss.” It’s something I struggled with. It’s a discipline of small things. It’s coming from personal experience. If I drop something, I wouldn’t pick it up for a couple of days and it would bother me. If I knew I was supposed to do something for someone and if I didn’t do it, I wouldn’t even speak up about it. I would wait a year and then I would finally do what I said I was going to do. Because I’m a man of my word, I never forget it. It’s wild.

CUE 43 | Lack Of Discipline

 

I started to learn that when I do this, it piles up. It’s like if you’re at a desk and it’s super messy and you keep on adding to it, you only take one item and you put it away, but then you add three more items after that. It’s a cycle of no return and you become more and more stressed. You can’t get as much work done. You keep forgetting things, you can’t find this, you can’t find that. It causes issues in your life. I’ve learned to be disciplined. Now, I’ve been flossing every single night, no matter what. It’s a discipline. It’s communicating with myself, “It’s okay, Brendan. Are you tired? Let’s fix that. Get better sleep, do this, do that. If you can’t be disciplined with your sleep, Brendan, it’s okay because you’re still going to get everything done that you say you’re going to get done and one of those things is flossing.”

Another is with my team. Sometimes I go from this demeanor and I talk down sometimes and I hate it. I hate when I do it. It’s almost as if like I can’t control the ego at that specific time. When I do catch myself, I say, “I take responsibility. I am not supposed to be doing that. That’s not respectful to you because you’re not my employee. You are my team member. You are my partner in this. It doesn’t matter if you’re my support or if you’re the support for CreateU. If you’re the creative director, if you’re the COO, if you are an actual partner with me, you’re still a partner in my heart. You’re still a team member and there’s no way that that’s acceptable for me to talk down to you.” Yes, some people might say, “It’s cool. It’s important. Sometimes you need to do that.” No, you can always talk to someone like they are the same as you. You are never on a pedestal. You are never better than anyone. It doesn’t matter if you’re a billionaire or you make $10, if you’re a barber or I’m getting the cut from you as the barber. Yes, you may be the teacher. Yes, you may be the mentor, but what better way to teach and mentor and provide mentorship than with a leveling playing ground? Be level with every single person that’s in front of you.

That’s why when I step on stage, I speak to everyone the same. I talk to you like you’re my friend. I called you after three years of playing college football and I’m going to the national championship. I’m calling you like, “I’m going to the national championship.” I’m like, “Do you remember?” It’s like a normal life. That’s how I treat everything. Those are four of the things that I’m not proud of but I’m thankful for because I always get to work on them at all times. I know that the goodness of my heart outweighs anything else. That ego, I’ve gotten so much better. I used to be so much worse.

CUE 43 | Lack Of Discipline

 

Now a lot of the people are talking down to me because I’m like, “Tell me what I need to hear. Confront me with everything.” What I want you to do now, whether it’s Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, whatever day it is, I want you to go up to your employer. I want you to go up to your mom, your dad, your friend and I want you to talk to them and open your heart and trust. A lot of people have trust issues. I have trust issues. Everyone has trust issues actually. If you can say you don’t, you’re lying to yourself. Trust yourself. Open your heart further than you ever have before. If that means a little bit more than you ever have previously in your life, then you won. If you’re holding back and you know you want to say something, your gut is telling you to say something or you want to share something.

Maybe you’re having a hard time because your mom’s sick, your dad’s sick or your friend’s sick, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, someone’s sick or you’re hurt. You’re going to work and your employer doesn’t even know and he or she is getting upset at you, but you won’t tell them what’s going on in your mind. Now is the opportunity because believe it or not, your vision could be right around the corner, the happiness, the goodness could all be right there. Maybe life is teaching you something. It’s time to teach yourself by trusting, by communicating and by giving your all. You deserve it. Hopefully, you enjoyed this Quick Time Friday. I love having these conversations with you because I feel like I’m talking to you. I don’t feel like I’m talking to anybody else, just you. That’s it and it’s beautiful.

You can check out CreateU Nutrition. If you want me to talk with anybody and you want them to fly out here to Denver, maybe I’ll fly out to LA, then I’ll do so. Throw that in the review. If you do review this, hopefully five stars, then we will give you seven incredible free items. A meal plan, we’ll give you an ab workout program. We’ll give you the Shred Fast program. We’ll give you a business builder, a checklist, and so much more to build your business. All you have to do is click the link, put your email in and write a review. Once we see it, you’ll get an email with your login credentials and you’ll be invited into the CreateU dashboard. Thanks.

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