When you’ve lost trust in people, it usually means that the other person might’ve let you down. However, we may not realize it but a lot of the times, we are actually the ones at fault. We’re the ones that are so insecure that we lose trust with someone else. Trust is something tough to come by with people, especially with ourselves. How many of us actually trust ourselves? In this episode, get rid of the impossible and learn to trust yourself again so you can fully open to it and be present to the opportunity of regaining trust in people.
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How To Regain Trust… Enemies Are Your Friends!
Getting Rid Of “Impossible”
I’m super excited to be talking about a subject that most people don’t like to deal with or confront. I get to do what I want to do because this is the CreateU Experience. If you’re new here, every Tuesday and Friday we have a new episode. Sometimes it’s on YouTube, which is cool. Also when you review the episode, there’s a link and you get seven free gifts. You’re going to get meal plans. A lot of cool things including business builders and checklists. A lot of people love that part of it. Please, I would love to see your review. It’s only on iTunes, so make sure you put your email in there and it will be safe with me and safe with a team.
What did I do? I trained back. I’m on a higher carb, so I’m competing October 5th. I’m super excited about that. I would love to win first place and not just to beat everybody, but to prove to myself that I can do it naturally and compete at a very high level. I would love to go pro. I’d love to do a lot of different things, but with the Quicktime Friday, you have so many things going on. Maybe you’re reading this another day. Right now is a big-time because we have an opportunity to confront trust issues. That’s what we’re going to be talking about on this Quicktime Friday. The reason why I want to talk about trust issues is that I actually got a DM. I told you that I want to respond to your DMs and I want to take a stand for people that follow, read and that trust in this process, the CreateU Experience and everything.
This is the message I received, “I have big-time trust issues. Could you do a Quicktime Friday? Make a story or something to get the rest of your followers and me some strategies on how to regain trust in people. I love to get your insight on this.” When you’re regaining trust in people, that means that the other person might have let you down. A lot of the times, and actually we don’t even look at it from this perspective, but we are the ones at fault. Sometimes we’re the ones that are so insecure that we lose trust with someone else. Maybe someone is standing for us or someone is trusting us. The way that they’re trusting us, standing up for us or loving us is by telling us how it is. Maybe they’re saying, “You’re not talking to any of your friends anymore.”
You moved on and you get pissed off and you’re like, “Don’t tell me whatever.” These types of situations happen every single day and we get defensive. When we get defensive, it opens up this little wound. As more and more things are said, even small things that maybe didn’t even affect us in the past, it gets into that wound. It gets infected and soon enough, it’s something that we don’t want to deal with anymore and we lose trust. Trust is something tough to come by with people, especially with ourselves. How many of us trust ourselves and be real with yourself? Don’t lie and be like, “I trust myself so much and all these different things.” Actually, the majority don’t trust. It’s the truth, whether we don’t trust our relationship, we don’t trust our own intentions, we don’t trust how capable we are. That’s the number one thing that we don’t trust.
Before we do anything and discuss anything about advice and what you should do to regain trust with someone else, look at the mirror and look at yourself. Why aren’t you trusting that person anymore? Are you afraid? Are you looking at yourself and thinking, “I don’t think I can, I think it’s impossible?” If you think trusting someone else again is impossible, it means that you’re not trying hard enough. It means that you’re in a habit way too long telling yourself that the impossible is real and the impossible is just that. There is no possible from that. You’ve got to remember the word impossible was created first as the word possible. IM was before that. You have to think it like there are after that.
You have to think of it from the perspective, “I am possible. Everything is possible.” That’s what CreateU is all about. When you’re experiencing these feelings, number one, look at yourself in the mirror before you do anything and look at the situation. Is it something that is that aggressive and something that is taxing on your relationship with that person? Maybe it shouldn’t be and the majority of them shouldn’t be. There’s this one situation which I will not get into because this will have someone crying and I don’t want to do that, but I have brought it up with this person several times. Because this person didn’t do what this person said they were going to do, there’s a big tragedy.The unknown is what destroys people. It brings anxiety, depression, and stress. Communicate with that person. Click To Tweet
It went to the downfall of that relationship with another person. This came from a mistake on their own. They didn’t fully look at that mistake and see where that wound started, it ended up with a bad relationship. Two people not wanting to talk to each other anymore and not being friends anymore. We don’t want that because everyone around us should be a friend. Whether someone’s in need or someone did something bad, we should see the good in every single person because it’s there, and that’s what CreateU is all about. When we talk about strategy, first of all, look at yourself in the mirror and then number two, ask a question.
It’s as simple as that. Sit down and ask an open-ended question with an open mind. That’s what an open-ended question is. It’s whatever comes at the end of that answer is welcomed. It’s going to be looked at. There’s going to be insight, there’s going to be the analytics, and there’s going to be the marketing behind it. What I generally do, before I jump into conclusions sometimes to be honest, if I’m low-calorie because I’m prepping, I jumped to conclusions quickly and I ignite, I say something quickly. The reality is when we take a step back and maybe we’ll be cooled down, maybe when we walk away for a little bit or we just ask a question, we learn way more than we gain much more insight as to why maybe we would find his trust.
More times than not, when we communicate, trust is always there. Imagine if someone doesn’t show up. Does that hurt your trust or does that gain trust? Obviously, it hurts your trust and then you feel like what are the true intentions behind that? Let me ask you something about this. What if someone is pretty nasty to you but they always show up for you time and time again? Will you have trust in that person? Most likely. Honestly, when I think about it and people in my life, the people that don’t show up, it’s hard to trust them, but the people that do show up and they might be foul language to me or whatever it is, I know they care.
I know that their intentions are to help me, is to stand for me, is to be there for me even when maybe I don’t want them to be there for me and that’s a beautiful thing. That’s another tactic to ask the question about that. Are they showing up for me? Do they show up? How do their actions speak? If they’re not showing up, then rightfully so there are some trust issues there. In order to gain that trust back, that person used to show up and they need to show up in your way, not in their way. That’s so important. This is another aspect of regaining trust with someone. You have to communicate. Sit down with them. Communicate with them. If you do not communicate, you’ll never know. If you never know, the unknown is what kills people.
The unknown is what destroys people. The unknown is what brings anxiety, depression and stress. You know what happens when you have increased cortisol levels and stress comes, disease comes in a lot more. Relationships fall and so much that you do not want to deal with. Communicate with that person, that partner, that relationship, that influencer, that boss, that leader, that mom, that dad, that cousin. Ask the question and see if they’re showing up. If they don’t show up for you in the way obviously because if they hurt your trust, then it’s because they did something after looking at the situation like, “For sure it wasn’t me.” There are always things that we can work on of course, but if the majority was somebody else and you’ve tried to do everything in your power except for communicating because generally, that’s why a lot of people have these issues.
You see that person will show up in your “love language” because everything’s a relationship. Everything’s a marriage. A relationship is marriage. Your friendships are marriages. You’re signing on the dotted line when you say, “You’re my friend. You are someone that I care about. You’re someone I want to go to bat with. I respect you.” These are marriage qualities: communication, relationship, the whole thing. If that person does not show up and you see it time and time again, the first fault is, “I’ll give you another chance.” The second fault, the mistake, “I’ll give you another opportunity to rehash.” The third time you strike out and shame on you. That’s the truth because that means that there is something that’s not there between that relationship, that communication.You cannot change someone. The person needs to change themselves. Click To Tweet
There’s something that’s missing even within yourself. Sometimes you have to walk away and move on. If it keeps on happening time and time again, that person is not right for you in your life. You cannot change someone. The person needs to change themselves. Don’t try and control the situation. Allow the situation to unfold the way it’s going to unfold and you be in the driver’s seat of your own side. If someone cheats on you and you want to earn trust back, let that person show up for you until you feel in your gut that you could trust them again. Because until you trust them again, there’s not going to be any trust and that’s not going to be great in a relationship.
The same thing with the business partner. If a business partner does something to you in order to gain back trust and that’s difficult. That is one of the most difficult things because a business partnership is a marriage 100%. You sign on the dotted line, you guys could be great friends, but you involve money, and money moves the world. It’s unfortunate, but bunny money moves countries and moves cities. It moves trains it moves. It moves things around us, everything. Where we’re living our environment. The people around us, it sucks, but that is the truth. If it moves, then be prepared. That’s all I can say. Be prepared to work hard because if you’re not willing to open those doors to regain the trust, then it’s never going to happen.
Even in a business relationship as difficult as it is, if someone does something wrong, maybe take some money, look at the root. Ask why? Be there for them. If you’re there for somebody that you lost trust for, you’d be so surprised at how much more trust gained, regains and solidifies over a period of time. It’s beautiful, especially have you ever seen those people that blowing to me, but when they’re in court and the other person killed their daughter, their son or their friend, they forgive them. It’s the most empowering thing I’ve ever seen. I don’t know how they do it. I don’t even know if I would be able to do that. Honestly, no, I would want to kill the other person. There are people that have actually done it.
How many of them are honest? I don’t know, but some of them have been completely honest. They forgive this person and they try and help this person. Try to get this person to be better. When you do that, you show up for someone that is lacking. You’ve got to remember if they did something to you, there’s something going on deeper in the roots of all of that evilness that has come up for them, the anxiety, the stress. There’s something, maybe it’s a relationship. Maybe it’s their mom, maybe it’s their dad, maybe they saw something horrific or they were beaten. Imagine if you stand for them more than you could ever imagine. That right there, you’ll see a different transformation in that person and the trust will regain.
It’s a hard process, it’s a tough process but to summarize, first you’ve got to look at yourself. Number two, you’ve got to communicate. Number three, it goes in with communication. You’ve got to ask questions before you jumped to conclusions. Number four, you just have to stand for that person. Number five, you have to make sure they know how to regain trust and showing up for yourself. Whatever your love language is. It could be certain things like certain words that they’re using or how they’re showing up. There are so many different ways. Number six, be fully open to it and be present to the opportunity of regaining trust. That’s what I got for you.
Regaining trust here on a Quicktime Friday. That was super exciting. Thank you so much for reading for another episode of the CreateU Experience. Quicktime Fridays are one of my favorites. There are so many exciting opportunities and things going on. I love you so much. October 5th, I am stepping on stage. Also, CreateU Nutrition is launching on July 30th and then September 10th, around the Olympia dates. That’s when we’re going to have even more bottles. We’re starting off with 2,500 pieces of greens, 2,000 creatine. We’re going to be bumping up to 5,000 greens, 4,000 probiotics and prebiotics, which we’ve created and formulated all of these things, incredible pricing.
$2 shipping domestic and $7 in international. Don’t quote me on that, but that’s what we’re working towards, the packaging, everything, the influencers. They’re making so much more money. I’m super excited about them. That consumer, you’re going to be able to get a product that’s so high quality for such a beautiful and reasonable price. You’ll know that not only are you aiding in the success of other influencers and aiding them making money for living for themselves, but you’re also going to be taking a product that you can trust, you can love, you can consistently follow because you know it’s always going to be upgraded. It’s always going to be better and better every single time you take it. Thanks so much for reading for another episode. I appreciate you so much and I’ll see you next time.