Episode 76: You Are Holding Yourself Back!

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Episode 76: You Are Holding Yourself Back!

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Vulnerability is a quality that gets talked about a lot, but no matter how liberating the feeling of true vulnerability, of authenticity, is, people are afraid that any expression of vulnerability is grounds for judgment from others. But preventing yourself from being vulnerable might also be the one thing that’s stopping you from fully enjoying everything the world has to offer. Brendan Myers explores the feeling of vulnerability: what stops people from being vulnerable and how to get over the barrier. Sooner or later, you’ll be trapped in a cage of your own making. Learn how to get out of that cage, and open yourself up to the experience of vulnerability and authenticity.

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You Are Holding Yourself Back!

Completely Let Go

Vulnerability is so important for our growth and vision. Click To Tweet

I’m going to even skip the intro and dive right in because this is something that I see in society time and time again with all people and even myself. I want to make sure that we dive right in and jump through the hurdles, the pain and the frustration, the barriers and all these shit. Create these bridges in our lives so we can be evolutionary with our thinking, our love and our vulnerability. I want to use that word vulnerability time and time again because it’s important for our own growth and our vision at the end of the day. Ignite your breakthrough and bring your vision to life, that’s what CreateU is all about. I was on three phone calls and all were very similar. It’s very interesting. It was like the show was calling my name, like, “Do an episode on this.”

CUE 76 | Being Vulnerable
Being Vulnerable: People put up barriers because they don’t want other people seeing the real them, and they fear the judgment they will get.

They were surrounded by all these barriers that these specific individuals have up in their lives and how they don’t like to get vulnerable with people. I sat there and listened. I had many questions pop up in my own mind. I was like, “Ask this question,” but instead, I listened. It was interesting because what all of these three people have in common and I loved them deeply. I care a lot about them. A couple of them I don’t know even too much, but I still care much about them is that it was coming from a place of pain. I could feel it by the way they were talking and the way they were shifting. I could feel it within myself how much pain that I had a long time ago before I made the proper steps and transformation in my life to be who I am now.

I’m still growing, but I used to have so many barriers up in my life. Why did I have all these barriers? I didn’t want people to see the true me because if they saw the true me, if they saw the real Brendan Meyers, they could judge me and they could form factual opinions. I mean factual, the opinions are based on factual stuff about myself and then they would know everything about me. I almost felt like if I was giving up all that I had through letting people know who I am through my demeanor, through my vision, through the people I like to be around, the sports that I liked, the hobbies and everything, then I feel like I wouldn’t have anything left to offer. I felt like if I told someone how I felt about them, that they would take it wrong and immediately, my image would be damaged.

All we want to be is happy, and that comes down to vulnerability and authenticity. Click To Tweet

How often do all of us do this in our lives? Thankfully I’ve been able to evolve from that way of thinking and transform and be myself 100% of the time because I know deep down, all we want to be is happy. How do we get to happiness? Remember, there are many layers over happiness. True happiness is down to the core, the soul and the heart. It’s down to love. It’s down to vulnerability and authenticity. How do we get to that point? In these conversations, I asked the same thing. I was like, what’s holding you back? What’s making you feel that way? What’s this? What’s that? It always led to insecurities and images. We don’t want to be judged in a negative way. I don’t want to fucking be judged in a negative way.

CUE 76 | Being Vulnerable
Being Vulnerable: No one wants to be judged in a negative way so they don’t show the parts of themselves that they’re insecure about.

I used to like care so much, but do I take it to heart if someone judges me in a certain way? No, because I know who I am and if I expressed it in the wrong manner, that’s on me. That doesn’t change who I am or what I want to do or what I want to accomplish. Does that make sense? I want to ask you a question. Where in your life are you creating barriers? Remember, the barriers aren’t only there to protect for people coming in, but they’re also holding you back from getting out, from going places, for adventure, for opportunities and for everything in between. What are you going to do? You’re still going to have barriers. We’ve developed them over our entire lives but what are you going to do so that you can break free?

I say build a bridge. Build something that you can climb, something that you can utilize consistently. Start it off with a ladder. It takes a little bit longer to jump over those barriers. You got to climb. It’s one hand after another, but then evolve and built an actual bridge. First, it’s not going to have any real nice cement. Every time you’re walking, it’s going to hurt your feet. Maybe it’s dirty and there are many issues. From there, create the cement and make a pavement, so it’s smooth. That bridge over your barriers from your heart and from your soul to the opportunities, to your future, to your vision, to your relationships and to the people around you is smooth sailing and easy. Soon enough, you’re going to recognize that these barriers have been doing nothing but holding you back.

Barriers protect you from people coming back, but they also hold you back. Click To Tweet

You not being vulnerable, open and honest with people around you have been holding you back. There’s this phrase that gets me every time, “I don’t care what people think. I don’t care about this.” Have you ever asked yourself, “Really?” Is that fucking true? I’ll tell you this much when I say I don’t care, I care. Because I say I don’t care, it puts me in this frame of mind of like, “I’m going to be myself,” but I care. The truth is the majority of us care. We all care. At the end of the day, we care about us, we care about me.

CUE 76 | Being Vulnerable
Being Vulnerable: Soon enough, you’ll recognize that your barriers are just holding you back. You not being vulnerable and honest and open with the people around you is just holding you back.

It’s the me, that’s who we care about. This image stuff, this deflection, the defense mechanisms and all of these things that pop up time and time again in situations. When you have the opportunity to ask for support, when you have the opportunity to ask if someone loves you, when you have the opportunity to help someone else, when you have the opportunity to work in a job that maybe you don’t even know if you’re going to like or not because of the boss and this and that. When you have this opportunity, that opportunity, that path and this and that.

Take full ownership of it. Ownership looks like this, happiness. Because happiness is at our core and vulnerability is the one thing that allows other people and the environment in this world to see what’s at our core. When people can see what’s at our core, we can see other people. Thanks for tuning in for this episode. Check out CreateU Nutrition. We got awesome and incredible products coming out. I’m also going into prep and I have a big series called Inside My Mind coming out. It’s going to be big time. Thanks for tuning in. I’ll see you next time. Peace.

 

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